Page 17 of Touch of Hate

The door creaks as it opens, and my mother’s head pops inside. I can see the concern etched into her features. Features that make me feel like I’m looking in the mirror. She brushes a few strands of blond hair from her heart-shaped face. Older or not, she is still beautiful, oozing a youngness that sometimes makes me forget she is my mother and not a best friend.

“Is everything okay? I was knocking, and you didn’t answer, but I didn’t want to barge in.”

“Everything is fine,” I lie through my teeth.

He promised me forever, but I only got a few stolen moments and kisses in the shadows. Was I really ever his? I already know the answer. I look up at my mother, wishing I could tell her all the secrets I hold inside, but knowing how loyal she is to my father and the rift it might cause between them if I tell her, I choose to keep it to myself. It’s for the best, even if it means I’ll have to drown in my own sorrows.

“Your father told me about Ren. I know he was like a brother to you.”

I almost snort. Brother. Ren was nothing like a brother to me. He was so much more. “If you want me to stay with you, I can. I’ll just sit here and keep you company. You look sad, and I don’t want you to be alone.”

I love my mother, but I need to be alone.

I need to mourn the loss of something I never really had and the love of a man I’ll never be able to move on from.

“I’m okay, Mom. Whatever it was that happened, I’m sure it was a misunderstanding. He would never hurt his family or friends.”

My mother nods, but I can tell she doesn’t believe that statement. I force myself to believe it because there is no other option. Ren isn’t the villain. He isn’t. He can’t be, not when he’s played the knight in every memory and thought I’ve ever had about him.

“I want to believe that too, honey, but I don’t know if I can. The proof is right in front of us, and the odds are stacked against him. Unless he comes out of hiding and explains himself, we’ll never know.”

I frown because the alternative is crying, and if I start that again, I’ll never stop. No matter what they think, I know Ren. I know the softness and good that he shows only to me. I love him, and nothing anyone says will change that.

I’ll hold on to the promises he made me until the day he breaks them.

Ren was never a choice for me; he was always my end goal.

5

SCARLET

I stand in front of the mirror and run a hand down the front of my red velvet sequin dress. It’s beautiful with a sexy low neckline and crisscross straps across the back. It comes to rest against my thighs and fits as tight as a glove. I look gorgeous in it, and if we were anywhere else but at home with our friends and family, my father would never allow me to wear this.

Not with how eye-catching and short it is.

I peer at my reflection one last time. My hair is curled, the blond strands resting against my breasts. Tessa—my cousin and confidante—did my makeup, giving me smoky eyes.

I have every reason in the world to smile tonight, but I can’t bring myself to do so. In just a few moments, I’ll walk down the stairs to the birthday party my mother spent countless hours planning. Everyone will smile, converse, and enjoy themselves. Everything will be perfect except for the one missing piece. The one person who matters most to me.

“Don’t be sad. If you start crying, it’ll ruin your makeup, and then I’ll have to kick your ass,” Tessa harasses from the doorway.

I whirl around and force my lips into a small smile. “Watch out, big bad Tessa’s on the loose.”

Her expression becomes coy. “Have you seen the guns I’m carrying?”

She points at her biceps, and I can’t help but laugh at her joke. Little does she know, every family member is armed in some way, or at least there is a weapon within reach.

In many ways, I long to be like Tessa—smart, funny, and creative. She’s innocent and kind, and unbeknownst to her, she’s also a part of one of the most sinister mafia families on the West Coast.

Uncle Ivan and Aunt Violet feel it is right to keep her hidden from the family business for as long as possible. I can’t blame them for it, but then again, the day she finds out, I can only imagine her feeling complete betrayal at their deceit. I should have already told her the truth, but I can’t bring myself to do it.

I know it’s only a matter of time, but if she’s not asking questions, there isn’t a reason to explain things to her.

Worst of all, because she knows nothing about our world, she has no idea that Ren betrayed the entire family, and that betrayal has caused a huge rift between all of us. Maybe she feels it and hasn’t said anything, or maybe she doesn’t even care. I’m not sure, but she’s one less person I can talk to about things, and that sucks.

I try not to think of Ren as I let Tessa guide me out into the grand foyer. She’s wearing a gold dress with her dark hair tied up in a high ponytail. The smile of confidence she wears is contagious.

I look from her to my family, my father, standing beside my mother, his dark hair graying. Worry lines crease his forehead though he disguises them with a smile. My mother peers up at me with adoration, her blond hair intricately done, her blue eyes sparkling. Even when she’s dressed up, the red chiffon dress clinging to her body, it’s impossible to tell she is over the age of forty.