Page 13 of Traces of Her

Eight

ROWENA

“What’s your poison, sweetheart?” a burly man asks, standing beside the refrigerator in the kitchen. He pulls open the door revealing an assortment of different types of beer and other alcoholic drinks. He opens the freezer door above with a display of different liquors.

I glance around the room checking to see what some of the other girls are drinking. “I’ll take a Miller Lite,” I declare, pointing into the fridge. He pops it open and hands it to me. I take a sip of it and almost spit it out again. It tastes like piss water - trust me, I know what that tastes like.

I give him a small smile, concealing my disgust and blending in with the other people here. The kitchen quickly fills up and the space grows smaller, quickly pushing me into the living room. The large area is filled with people dancing with their drinks sloshing in the smoky air. A hand snakes around my arm, startling me. I whip around and find Scarlet in my space.

“We lost you for a little,” she yells over the loud music. “Come on, we’re going to find Charlie.”

I nod, letting her lead me deeper through the crowd of people. We finally come to a stop at one of the doors in the hallway. The guy leading Scarlet’s group bangs on the door. “POLICE! OPEN THE FUCK UP!” he screams at the door.

“Jared!” Scarlet yells, slapping his arm. “Stop fucking around!”

Jared started laughing loudly, his eyes meet mine and I feel the cold in my bones. Yet there’s something inside them that I know. They’re dead, black pools of darkness with a permanent emptiness. He knocks back on the door. “April Fool’s! It’s Jared.”

I cock my head to the side, trying to assess his sense of humor.

It’s not even April.

I come up empty-handed.

I’m lost in my head when the door is ripped open. “Charlie, my man,” Jared says, pushing past him into the room. I hang toward the back while the rest of the group files in.

“Come on in,” a gruff voice calls over to me. I look up and meet his warm brown eyes and he smiles. The skin on his face is aged and weathered with his hair peppered. “Come on, Casper,” he urges again. “I’m not a pedo, you’re safe in here.”

“Casper?” I ask quietly, walking past him.

“You know, Casper the Friendly Ghost?” he questions, cocking his head to the side. “You look like you could be his sister or some shit.”

I smile and quietly laugh to myself as he steps back into the room behind me. He pulls the door shut and I hear the click of a lock. My heart jolts in my chest and I spin around to face him, eyes wide with panic. I quickly glance around blocking out the sounds of the others and try to plan my escape. Charlie’s large hands grip my shoulders, giving me a small shake. I look up at him, frantically shaking my head as my chameleon skin slowly falls off.

“Yo, chill out,” he says in a low voice. “The lock? Is that your deal?” His warm eyes search mine for answers.

I swallow hard, not trusting him yet finding comfort in his tone. I give him a quick nod and cast my eyes to the ground.

“It’s a habit and for safety. I got too much money tied up in this room to risk losing it,” he tells me. “Casper,” he says, grabbing my chin. “You’re cool here. I’m old enough to be your dad and I don’t get down with shit like that. I don’t know the shit you’ve been through,” he says, eyeing my shoulder. “But you don’t gotta worry about that here. No one will fuck with you here, a’ight?” he gives me a stern, yet soft look.

Shaking off the fleeting feelings of panic, I slowly nod and give him a small smile.

He nods and smiles back. “Cool,” he says, walking farther into the room. “So what the fuck are you here for, Jared?”

The room grows quiet and Scarlet waves me over from her spot on the white leather couch. I quickly shuffle over and sit down beside her, watching Charlie inch closer to Jared.

“Word on the street is you got some good crystal and H right now,” Jared tells him.

If it weren’t for Intervention, I’d have no knowledge of drugs whatsoever. I knew this place was shady so I shouldn’t be surprised to hear what Charlie does.

Charlie rolls his eyes. “Yeah, what street was that?” he laughs.

“You always got the good shit. I just heard your re-up this time was even better,” Jared shrugs. “Hook your boy up.”

Charlie laughs even harder. “My boy?” he scoffs. “You think you’re my fuckin’ boy?”

I glance over at Scarlet, unsure of what the hell is going on. Scarlet shrugs and leans toward me. “They always do this shit,” she says.

“You’re not my fuckin’ boy,” Charlie barks. “You’re a fucking junkie and a tweaker. You give me money, I give you the drugs, that’s all this is. And you come to my house for the parties that I never attend,” he pauses, crossing his arms over his chest. “So please, keep tellin’ me how you’re ‘my boy.’”