Page 25 of Traces of Her
Sixteen
ROWENA
GRIFFIN FEEDS ME, CLOTHES ME like I’m a kept woman and he fills the fridge with enough food that could feed an entire family for weeks. As soon as we came back to his house, I retreated to my new room without leaving any time for conversation. After using up all of the hot water in the shower, I hang up my new winter wardrobe, a gnawing voice in the back of my head reminds me of how much of a fraud I am, how this could never be my life. It’s been one day with him so far, soon enough the other shoe will drop, and I’ll meet the real Griffin. When that happens, I’ll be ready. I’m selfish, I do for me and only me. Guards mustn’t fall, people can never be trusted.
Everyone that I’ve trusted has done me wrong in one way or another. The only person who came close to earning my trust was Charlie, but in the end, he was just as selfish as I am. He chose his own life over saving mine and I would have made the same choice if I had to. That’s just how things are, you either accept it and live or you don’t and pray to God you make it out alive.
I don’t pray to God.
He can’t help me.
Only I can help me.
A knock on the bedroom door startles me, leaving me frozen in place with my fight or flight response on standby. “Rowena, are you still awake?” his voice, silk like satin, slips through the cracks around the door and the panic inside me quickly dissolves. Just hearing him puts me at ease and I don’t like it. It’s like a false sense of security when in reality I can’t rely on him for anything. I’m just a job, a chore, nothing more, nothing less. He doesn’t want me here anymore than I want to be.
“Come in,” I tell him, continuing to put my clothing away. The door opens softly and there’s a shift in the air, the same one I feel whenever he’s near. It’s that gentle, subtle magnetic force pulling me toward him. Keeping my back to him, I move around my room as if he isn’t there.
“Are you getting settled in here alright?” he asks, with a genuine tone in his voice.
Suppressing a laugh, I nod, smiling to myself. He acts as if I have any choice but to just go with the way things are right now.
“Okay, good,” he says unconvinced, under his breath. “I need you to come and work for me.”
Spinning around to face him, I struggle to maintain composure. He’s affecting me more than I need him to. It’s not a good thing at all.
“Why?” I demand, louder than I intended.
His eyes widen a fraction as his eyes fully take me in. “I recently lost my assistant and I need a new one,” he shrugs. “Why not?”
“Are you asking me or telling me?” I cross my arms, cocking an eyebrow at him.
Griffin takes a deep breath, his shirt tightening across his chest and he clenches his jaw for a moment. “It doesn’t fucking matter. You’re coming to work with me whether you’re going to be my new assistant or not.”
I stare at him for a few moments, glaring at him before rolling my eyes and turning toward the bed. “It’s not like I have a choice anyway,” I chide, pulling back the covers and climbing underneath them.
The blankets are ripped out of my hands by a furious Griffin. Sitting on the bed, he looks much taller as he towers over me breathing heavily. “You think I like any of this? That I wanted any of this?” he scoffs, narrowing his eyes at me.
I brace myself, waiting for the real Griffin to come forth and roar his ugly head at me. He stares at me for a moment and suddenly plops down onto the bed, putting his head in his hands. The silence grows heavy and thick with tension, weighing me down in place, leaving me frozen.
What the fuck is going on right now?
The confusion and adrenaline coursing through my veins won’t let me tear my eyes away from him.
After a few minutes pass, the bed shifts under his weight as he sits upright and slightly turns to face me. He runs his hands over his face, replacing the anger with a defeated look.
“Rowena,” he says quietly, his voice hoarse. “Neither of us asked for this to happen but it did. Jared fucked with the dealer that was handling our cards, so we just have to play the hand we’ve been dealt.”
Jared fucked with the dealer alright.
Slowly, I nod, unsure of what to say to him.
“You being here isn’t a problem as long as you don’t make it a problem,” he threatens in a contradicting tone. My eyes widen at his words and his match mine as his threat sinks in. “That’s not what I meant,” he starts back peddling. “Jared, he’s the problem. We have to play along with him, or else things could end very badly.”
Shaking my head, I resign any fucks that I once had.
“Look,” I start, pulling my legs closer to me, putting space between us. “I’ve been through enough shit, okay? I know how this goes and I’ll either make it out alive or I won’t.”
“I don’t know what all has happened to you and I don’t expect you to trust me enough to tell me. But I promise you, you will make it out alive.” He turns to fully face me, his eyes searching mine.