Page 34 of Madness

I was disgusted with myself because I’d been disappointed when he’d sent me home last night without touching me. I’d sat in the car with his Draco Malfoy bodyguard and wondered why he hadn’t touched me. Why I wanted him to?

Was it the danger? The pain? Because he was the most handsome person I’d ever seen? Or was it worse?

What I’d said to him was true. I knew he could kill me. A part of me wanted to let him. He wanted to break me, but I was already broken. Damaged beyond repair for even thinking these thoughts.

No.

I was going to stay alive. I promised my mother. Which means I needed to stay away from Maddox. Needed to fight whatever pull I had to him. To his particular brand of danger. Pleasure.

I walked out of the bathroom and dressed for work, ignoring the envelope of cash the bodyguard had handed to me last night. At least the money was helping me pay my rent. And I’d had a full meal last night. I might be able to use some of the money to stock my fridge too.

See, look at me thinking about the positive. Not letting the dark thoughts leak through my mind like venom.

I locked the apartment behind me and headed up the street towards Entice. There was no rain tonight. I missed the scent. It had hidden the death and rot that lingered on this side of town.

I crossed the street where Maddox had found me last night, but no black car stopped. I pushed away the tiny flicker of disappointment. I wasn’t going to think about him. He’d obviously decided that I was too broken for him to play with anymore; that had to be why he’d sent me home. It was a good thing. At least, that’s what I tried to tell myself.

I pushed through the back door of the club. Dancers walked around half-dressed as they touched up their hair and make-up. The steady beat of the music was dull back here as I stored my bag in a locker and slipped into my heels.

“Hey, girl.” Tessa’s voice called to me. “Where were you last night? You missed your shift.”

Shit. What was I supposed to say?

I went home with the Mafia king you told me to stay away from. Also, I think my body wants him to hurt me.

Yeah, that would go over well.

“Sick.” I blurted out. “I was sick. “

“Oh.” She looked me up and down like she was trying to find what was wrong. My mind, that was wrong. Very very wrong. Sick. “Well, Rodney was pissed. You might want to make nice tonight.”

I groaned as I walked by her. The last thing I wanted to do was play nice with my lecherous boss. But options were limited. I needed the job as demeaning as it was. At least it wasn’t as bad as selling myself to Maddox.

Somehow this job actually felt worse than that, which made no sense, but it was there. Maybe because Maddox seemed to … care. In his own twisted way, there was something there. Rodney didn’t care about a single one of us. We were just bodies to him. Not people.

The bass assaulted my ears as I walked into the club’s main area. We were packed with our usual Saturday night crowd. Bachelor parties, married men looking for an escape, and shady businessmen looking for a quiet corner.

Without permission, my eyes flicked to the private room. No guards were standing outside the door. My heart knocked before falling into rhythm. Maddox wasn’t here. That was good.

I saw Rodney standing by the bar and turned in his direction. I ground my teeth together, preparing to sweet-talk him into letting me keep my job. As soon as he saw me, his expression hardened.

“I’m sorry I missed my shift. I was sick.” I said. “It won’t happen again.”

I gave him an apologetic smile, but fire burned in his eyes. Was he really this angry over one missed shift?

“Let’s talk in my office.” He grabbed my arm roughly. His fingers digging into my flesh as he dragged me towards the back hallway that led to his office. He flung the door open with such force it smacked into the wall. Then he slammed it close before tossing me into a chair in front of his desk.

“What the hell?” I said. All fear of losing my job overtaken by my anger. I rubbed my bicep where his fingers had bruised me.

“You think you can do whatever you want because the owner took a shine to you.” He ground out through a clenched jaw. His face was red, and his breathing heavy.

Had Maddox told him where I was last night? No. Why would he? Then why was Rodney so upset. I’d never seen him like this. He was an angry asshole, but this went beyond anger. This was rage. At me.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was sick.” I said again, trying to soothe my voice.

“You fucking women. Always looking for the bigger man.” He paced back and forth. “You flirted with me. Showed off your body. But then a bigger fish came along, and you toss me aside.”

What? He was delusional. I’d never flirted with him. He was disgusting.