Page 12 of Just Mr. Love

I instantly know I’ve made a mistake in telling Kyle because his eyes do that thing where he’s looking at me but doesn’t see me. His mind is plotting and scheming something.

“Kyle, whatever you’re contemplating right now, don’t.”

“But this could be good. If he figures out the secret Huff-sauce, we could give it to a trained soldier. Or an entire army.”

“No, Kyle. Absolutely not. Haven’t you watched, like, every fucking sci-fi movie on the planet with that trope? Never ends well.”

“This isn’t a movie.”

“Which makes it worse. The second one of those soldiers is captured, and his or her blood is studied, our enemies’ll make their own army of Huffs, and then we’d have to make new and improved Huffs.” It’ll be Huff-ageddon.

I suddenly think of River and how unsafe she’d be living in a world full of men who could do anything they like to her. And if you think I’m being paranoid, the night I was changed, she was attacked by a guy on the football team. I stopped him. Later that night he tried to kill me, and she was next on his list. All because he was hopped up on Morris’s juice.

Now imagine how people would react if they were exposed to the crap that didthistome. The only reason I’m not running around in a constant roid rage is because I’ve worked hard at staying calm. I meditate, exercise, and practice staying in control. Otherwise, I’d turn into turbo-Dexter. Also, my heart could explode. Or not. Really, no one knows what would happen now that I’m fully detoxed.

“The other side of the coin,” Kyle says, “is that we’d have the greatest army in the world.”

Is he for real?“For a smart guy, you’re a fucking idiot. Morris has every intention of selling his formula to the highest bidder, and there’s no guarantee that’ll be the US.”

“Unless you become buddies with Morris and convince him to give it to us.”

Is he insane?No one should have the formula.

Suddenly, my purpose has never been clearer. I really do have to stop Morris before he figures out the rest of the recipe.

I have to kill him.And then I really do have to die. Otherwise, this won’t end. River will never be safe. Neither will my parents or Kyle. As for the rest of the world, no one will ever sleep again at night, knowing someone like me can zip right into their house at any time. No locks or alarms can stop me.

I need a plan.

I tell Kyle I’m on board so he’ll get off my back. I’m supposed to let him know once Morris reaches out, and then try to buddy up to him.

Nope. Not happening.Really, I’m planning to… Okay, I don’t know what I’m going to do exactly. Part of this whole thing requires playing it by ear. What I do know is that I have to work myself up to killing Morris. I can’t fail next time.

“I’m sorry, little guy,” I say to the squirrel I caught in a cage just outside my house on the lake. The furry brown critter squirms in my hand, squealing and snapping.

“This is for River,” I tell it. “You don’t know her, but she’s a really good person. And her eyes are…dark and…well, kind of like yours.” I notice the squirrel’s tiny little brown eyelashes and adorable whiskers poking out from its cheeks. The speckled colors of its black and brown tail are really kind of cool, too.Awww… He’s so soft.

“Sonofabitch! I can’t do it.” I open my hand, and Mr. Squirrel hops down in the dirt. Just before it disappears into the thick green jungle, it turns, gives me a look, and makes a mean little squeal sound.

“Did you just tell me to fuck off?” The thanks I get. Or maybe it was calling me a pussy for not having the balls to kill it.

I walk around back and plop down in my foldout chair, resting my face in my hands. “What am I going to do?” I can’t throw in the towel so soon. This is important. I need to be able to kill Morris the next time I see him.For River.

Maybe I should start smaller. Kill a few bugs first. Work my way up to a squirrel. Then I can kill something really close to a human, like a dog.No. Never. Maybe a cat?

“Hi, Huff,” says a soft female voice.

I turn my head, and River is behind me, staring with her big brown eyes. Her long black hair is up in a ponytail, and she’s wearing a snug pink T-shirt that shows off her large breasts.

I want to marinate in this mirage. I never want it to go away. But it always does, leaving behind a gnawing hollowness I can’t shake. That’s usually when I give in and visit her in the middle of the night.

“Go away. I’m not doing this anymore.” I turn back around and stare out at the water.

A few moments pass, and I turn my head, tempted for another glimpse. When I look, she’s gone just like before.

I can’t live like this anymore.Then again, I don’t have to. I just need to take out Morris and then get rid of myself. Sad, but true.

I grab my fishing pole, which is leaning up against the house near the back door. I put on a rubber cricket and toss the line in the water. I’ve never caught anything before because I suck at fishing, but if I want to protect River, I’m going to have to get serious about all this murder stuff. Fishing feels like a safe place to start.