Page 15 of Rocker

"Probably not. I wouldn't rule it out, though." We stare at each other for a long moment before Penn's expression relaxes just a little, and he steps back, leading me into the familiar kitchen, which I can see now has changed subtly since I was last here. A few of Daisy's sculptures from her senior art show are sitting on the table, a woman's sweater is tossed over the back of a kitchen chair, and a bowl of fresh fruit is on the counter. The whole place feels more lived in than it ever did in the days when Penn was traveling back and forth to LA, filming the hit TV show he's now left for my daughter.

Penn sits at one of the kitchen chairs, drumming his fingers on the table. " Daisy is out, but she'll be back soon. If you're here to say anything that will upset her-" There's an undercurrent of warning in his voice.

"I'm here to fix things." I draw a long breath. "I'm sorry I hit you."

"Are you?" Penn's eyebrows arch skeptically.

I heave a long sigh and take the seat across from him. "I am," I admit, running a hand through my hair. "I've handled everything poorly. But, I'm trying to do better."

Penn opens his mouth to reply, but we both look around at the sound of the front door opening and closing.

"Are you home?" Comes Daisy's voice and the sound of bags being put down. "I went to the store. I was thinking we could grill tonight?"

"I'm in here. We have company." Penn calls back, his eyes not leaving mine for a second. I know exactly what he isn't saying out loud, which is that he won't hesitate to give me the same treatment I gave him the last time we were in this room together if I do anything to upset Daisy.

Daisy's footsteps echo off the high ceilings, and then she's there, staring at me in shock. "Dad."

"I'm sorry to just turn up like this." I smile weakly, my whole chest tight with anxiety. "I thought we could talk."

Daisy nods slowly and moves around the table to sit beside Penn. "I thought you were on tour."

"I have a few days off." Sort of the truth, I blew off four press events to be here, but it doesn't matter. "I wanted to apologize. For how I handled things." I gesture vaguely between them.

"You were drinking?" Asks Daisy wryly

I shake my head. "Actually, I've been sober for over a year."

Both Penn and Daisy's jaws drop. "Why didn't you say anything?" Daisy gasps, "That's huge, Dad."

I shrug, biting back the usual shame and guilt I feel whenever I think about how out of hand I let things get. "I'm not proud of how I've lived my life or handled parenting you in the spotlight. I would do so many things differently now, but I can't. I can't tell you how sorry I am, kid. For all of it. I know saying all this doesn't fix anything, but I hope you'll let me start to make it right."

Daisy's eyes are filled with tears, and Penn reaches out to wrap an arm around her, kissing her hair. "What changed? Why are you saying all this now."

I stare down at my hands, which are folded on the table, my eyes catching on one of my newer tattoos, a little arrow that runs along the side of my thumb. Usually, when I get inked, I like to watch it happen, but with this one, I'd been too preoccupied with staring at my beautiful assistant sitting across the room with her nose in her laptop. God, I miss her so much.

Finally, I look up to meet Daisy's eyes. "Your Uncle Cash is a lot smarter than I am."

Penn snorts. "Got that right."

I look at him. "I'm sorry. Really fucking sorry, Penn. I fucked up reacting the way I did."

Leaning her cheek against his shoulder, Daisy smiles slightly. "I'm glad you came, Dad."

We talk for over an hour. Things aren't resolved yet, not by a long shot, but I feel about a million pounds lighter. It won't be easy, but I feel like I'm on good terms with my kid for the first time in months. If I'm honest with myself, I've been so overwhelmed by the prospect of fixing things and terrified of not being able to that I've done nothing at all.

After hugging Daisy goodbye and offering Penn a still somewhat-tense handshake, I'm on my way down the steps to the house and back to the airport when Daisy catches up to me.

"Wait, Dad." She closes the door behind her and pulls her sweater tighter around her. "I wanted to ask…. did you meet someone?"

I blink in surprise. "Meet someone? No, why would you ask that?"

Daisy shrugs. "Just a guess. If I'm wrong, though-"

"There's someone," I admit. "It isn't exactly new, but it's over. I fucked up."

Daisy's lips press together in a sad little smile. "It's Juliet, isn't it?"

Throat tight, I nod. "Yeah, it's Juliet. I think it's always been." I've met plenty of women, but I couldn't bring myself even to attempt to love them, and now that I know what it's like to love someone so all consumingly, I have to wonder if I was subconsciously waiting for just that. From the moment we met, my heart grew around her while she stood at the center of my life, solid and supportive and always there for me.