Page 78 of Because of Blake
As my trembling fingers type the message and hit send, I suddenly realize I’m unprepared for him not to respond. He always responds, right away. What if he doesn’t this time? What if he’s mad at me? He has a right to be.
BLAKE:Don’t be.
My entire body sags into my chair.
ME:No, I absolutely need to be. I was a jerk.
BLAKE:I understand. I know this is hard for you. I wanted to help, that’s all.
His sincerity shines through, even in text, and all I want is to be in his warm, affectionate embrace.
ME:I know.
BLAKE:Are you ok now?
ME:Yes.Would you like to come back for dinner? I totally understand if not.
BLAKE:I’ll be there at 6. Pizza?
ME:Sure, thx.
ME:So,are we good?
BLAKE:Maggie, we were never bad.
The doorbell rings at six o’clock sharp. I open the door to find Blake standing on my porch with two large pizzas in his hands.
I smile apologetically and say, “Hi.”
He smiles back and repeats, “Hi.”
We stare at each other for a moment until a gust of icy wind blows through the doorway. “Come in, sorry.” I take the pizzas from him, and he removes his coat, placing it on the rack.
Blake turns to me, puts his hands in his pockets, and his eyes briefly fall to the bag of Christmas decorations and the tote sitting next to them. A puzzled look comes over his face as he looks to me for confirmation.
“Sydney made a suggestion. The three of us pick our favorite Charlie decoration to put out, then we put all your decorations up together. So, we’re not replacing Charlie, we’re making new memories around the old ones.”
“She’s a smart kid.”
“I don’t know where she gets it from,” I joke.
Blake removes his hands from his pockets, leans down, and plants a kiss on my cheek. “From you.”
After dinner, Blake and I sit on the couch, enjoying a glass of wine and watching the kids fight about how to wrap the garland around the staircase banister.
“So, am I re-invited to Christmas dinner?” Blake asks.
“You were never uninvited.”
“Well, after this afternoon, I wasn’t so sure.”
I swirl my wine, watching the legs drain down the sides of the glass. “I’m so sorry for everything. I was out of line.”“No, Maggie. You were trying too hard to guard yourself, but you don’t have to with me, okay?”
“Okay.” I’m not very convincing, but Blake seems to accept me at my word.
“So, do you want me here for lunch or actual dinner on Christmas? When do you guys do presents and stuff?”
“I was thinking about that.” I turn to him, licking my lips. “Why don’t you come for dinner on Christmas Eve and stay the night?”