Page 112 of Muskoka Blue
Sarah propped her head in her hands and closed her eyes. It must just be jet-lag-induced tiredness that made her reasoning seem so blurry now. Something about him needing to know the depth of God’s mercy rather than papering over the heart cracks via a relationship with her. “It made sense over there.”
“So did you talk to him about this or just dump it on him and run?”
She winced.
“I’m gonna take that as a dump and run, then.”
“Bek, I’d really appreciate a little more understanding now.”
“I bet you would,” her sister continued relentlessly. “And I bet Dan feels the same.”
Her heart panged. Oh, he’d need to know God’s mercy, because she sure as heck wasn’t displaying any. Her eyes opened to see the cake sitting on the table. A memory flared of something Dan had once said.Here you can have your cake and eat it too.
No. She couldn’t. She wiped at a tear.
Bek grasped her hand. “Sar, from everything you and Mum and Dad have said, it’s obvious he loves you.”
Maybe he had, once upon a time. He probably didn’t anymore.
“And he’s patient.”
True.
“And he’s kind.”
Hold on. He wasn’t exactly Saint Daniel. “It doesn’t change the fact that he wants to be a dad and I can’t give him that.”
“Did he propose?”
“No,” she said in a small voice. And now he never would. Her chin quivered, and her eyes filled with fresh tears.
* * *
THUMP!
Dan gritted his mouth guard as he shoulder-slammed Tyler Woletsky into the boards at Madison Square Garden. The past couple of games, several members of opposing teams had been on the receiving end of his personal frustration. He wasn’t really proud of it, but the coach seemed pleased with his ramped-up level of intensity, and the points he’d received had been good. He skated back to position, intently watching the play. A chirp from New York’s Jenner saw Dan shove him, something that could’ve escalated into punches if Dan hadn’t pretended to not hear the expletive that dropped from Jenner’s mouth. Instead, he skated past, focused on the game, yelling encouragement to his teammates as sloppy play and agitated Rangers resulted in a powerplay for Toronto. Tim Carruthers, New York’s captain, pointed to the bench, which saw Jenner skate away, shaking his head. Tim might be captain of one of the Original Six teams, but Dan didn’t envy his friend now.
The powerplay began, and Toronto’s extra man advantage saw New York hustling as they tried to prevent Dan and his teammates from scoring. He focused on managing the puck at the blue line, moving it to the shooting lane for Brendan to bang it home. Andrei Novak stopped him, shooting the puck wide, forcing Dan to collect it off the boards as the two minutes counted down.
He needed to stay dialed in and concentrate on hockey. He needed all the distraction that tough workouts and hard, physical games could provide. He skated back into position at point, ready for the puck when it finally slid his way.
He stopped, steadied, and slapped the puck toward the net, hoping his teammates’ traffic in front would confuse New York’s goaltender. The red light above the net flashed, the space filling with the crowd’s boos.
“Goal!” Brendan skated up and thumped him on the shoulder. “Nice one, man.”
Tyler skated past, offering Dan a nod that said no hard feelings before commiserating with his teammates.
Dan skated off to the side to fist-bump his teammates. He grabbed a seat on the bench, glad to suck down another energy drink, and watched the replay on the Jumbotron. But his teammates’ cheers and the applause felt empty tonight.
He watched the action on the ice for another few minutes until his final shift. Skate, hit, scramble for the puck, another hit, blocked shot, clearing shot, then watching the play down the other end of the ice for the last minute of the third period. He tried to be excited that the team finally had some momentum going its way, but honestly, there were more important things in life.
The siren sounded, signaling the end of the game. They’d held off the Rangers by a goal, so there were some relieved faces from the coaches.
“Good game, Dizzy.”
“Thanks.” He should be happier, but all he wanted was to be away.
He followed the team down the tunnel, handed his stick to the equipment staff, stripped off his gear, and headed to the shower. The hot water massaged away some of the aches, but not where it really hurt. But then, what could help soothe the hollow spaces of his heart that had been carved out by a certain girl?