Page 79 of Montana Freedom

Now I knew they were lying.

But even then, the memories were convincing. Agent Jones could make a hell of a career as an actor.

Accessing Simon’s old website wouldn’t have tipped him off. That trap had clearly already been laid.

Nothing I remembered led me to believe I could have known this would happen. Spinning through the memories again, I couldn’t find anything I could use to stall Simon or convince him not to murder his only daughter. The only leverage I had was the fact that I’d already told them everything I knew. I couldn’t do any more damage because I’d already done it, and he’d managed to get out of it anyway by turning the agents on the case.

Or maybe he’d already had the agents on his payroll and had used them to find me.

A shiver ran down my spine.

That sounded more like him.

Every layer of Simon that was peeled back was another layer of horror and realization that he had spies everywhere. A network decades old and integrated so deeply, I was starting to wonder if it was even possible to stamp it out.

There were no windows in the van and no way to tell what time it was—only the ambient light that seeped through the cracks.

The longer we drove, the easier it was for the fear to sink in. Breath came shallow in my lungs, and my imagination created no shortage of scenarios for when we got to wherever we were going and I was dragged out in front of the man I thought was meant to love me.

Why didn’t I listen to Mom? She told me to stay away from him. She knew. Even if she didn’t know the full truth, she’d known out of instinct Simon was bad news.

I should have left well enough alone.

Instead, I focused on the good things within all the bad. I liked to think I would have found my way to Daniel no matter what, but it wasn’t true. We were from completely different worlds. Me struggling away in Missoula, trying to make life work without my mom and, without Simon, no way to pay for college. I would have had no reason to come up to this part of the state. No reason to seek out a group of ex-soldiers who helped people.

Even if I’d done everything the same, and Simon had decided not to go after Kate’s brother or if I hadn’t decided to poke into his office that day, we might never have crossed paths.

Potentially thousands of close-call decisions which could have kept us apart, each one clear in my mind. And of course, there were more than even I could think of.

It hit me in the chest like a blow. Not meeting Daniel—

My breath became shallow, and my heart kicked up into a pounding rhythm in my ears. The visceral fear of never having encountered him or dreamed about him. Never laughing with him or learning his secret smile or seeing the hunger in his eyes before we came together. That fear was far worse than the fear of being driven toward my death.

Would I face the end of Simon’s gun willingly? No. But regardless of what happened, I was grateful to have known and loved Daniel.

Loved him.

I brought my knees up to my chest and pressed the heels of my palms into my eyes to stop the tears. Such a simple thought, and yet it was so real. I loved him. Of course I did.

The truth was, I’d started loving him before we really met. My savior. The one who’d let me out of this fucking cage the first time. I wished I’d pulled him aside before I’d walked away from the van and told him just that—I wished I’d realized.

I didn’t have a way to tell him, but in case I didn’t get a chance to, I hoped he knew. The last month with him had been the best month of my life. Including all the bad things. I wouldn’t trade them for anything.

The van went over a bump, and the cage jostled, throwing me askew, but it jerked back before it could slide.

Turning, I looked closer at the bottom edge of the cage along the van wall. Straps. Two black straps were attached to the bottom to keep the cage from moving. It wasn’t much, but it was something.

The bars of the cage were metal, and they weren’t polished; they also had sharp edges. The question was if I could find one close enough to the straps to make a difference.

I remembered what I’d said, both to myself and to Daniel. I wanted a life. A life with him and a life with the family I’d found at Resting Warrior. If this was the end for me, I would try to accept it with grace. But until that final second, I would fight like hell to keep the life I’d found.

So I braced myself against the throbbing in my skull, turned, and started feeling along every metal ridge within reach.

Chapter26

Daniel

I watched Agent Jones get out of the van and walk toward us. “Excuse me, I need to check with Phillips.”