Page 53 of Was I Ever Free
Ikick the exit door closed with my foot, my nostrils flaring, huffing out frustrated breaths as I fish out my pack of cigarettes. Palming my still,raging,erection through my jeans, I groan out loud, wishing I could just go back inside and fuck Lucy against that dresser. But I know I won’t. Especially after what she said. No matter if she meant it seriously or not.
The strike of the lighter, followed by the spark of the flame coming to life has almost the same effect as the nicotine waiting for me on the other side of that first drag. My hand shakes, trying to light my smoke as fast as possible. I close my eyes, inhaling deeply, my head falling back between my shoulders. I can still smell her on my fingers while I smoke my cigarette, and it only exacerbates the barrage of thoughts in my head.
Opening my eyes, I stare at the night sky, the stars looking like loose glitter, breathing life into the vast expanse of darkness. When in reality, they’re all dead. Extinguished. Gone. Their shining light, the only thing left of them, traveling across the universe to reach us. I focus on the irony of it all for a little while, trying to calm down and finish my smoke.
I wasn’t lying when I told Lucy that the one room was for her own good. It’s just a matter of time before these MC fucks start sniffing around her like she’s fresh meat. A new little challenge and the winner gets their dick sucked. My vision starts to blur at the thought of any of these losers treating her like she’s just another chick passing through the clubhouse. At the very least, if we’re sharing a room, the smarter ones will stay away. And for the idiots? Well, we’ll just have to see about them.
My head snaps toward the approaching footsteps, tension releasing when I realize it’s Kenzie.
“Didn’t think I’d find you out here. You seemed quite pressed to be alone with the missus,” he drawls, taking a swig of the bottled beer he’s loosely holding.
“She’s not mine,” I mumble, the words tasting like rot as they leave my mouth.
“Could have fooled me, pal,” he answers with a chuckle.
I ignore him. Although, a swift punch to the Adam’s apple might do him one better.
“So, are you going to tell me what was important enough that you had to call in your favor?” I ask with as much disinterest as I can muster.
He takes another swig of his beer, looking up at the sky before answering.
“Gravediggers are out for blood. This time, they’re trying to hit us where it counts. We keep getting activity on our server that looks like someone’s trying to hack in. We have some… sensitive files that need some heavy-duty encryption. We have a guy,” he says, then looks at me with a crooked grin. “But he’s not you. We need that shit done fast and as usual, it needs to not just be hard to crack—but impossible. If they ever get their hands on that info—” he pauses, taking a sip of beer. “It could mean war.”
I’m familiar with the Gravediggers. They’ve been the Sin Eaters' rivals for as long as the Black Plague have been allies. I don’t bother asking what they’re trying to keep hidden. It’s not my job to care. I’ll find out eventually anyway.
“Give me full access to your system, and I can start now,” I tell him as I light another cigarette, still feeling on edge.
“Now?” he says with a laugh. “Shouldn’t you get some sleep first?”
“Do you want this shit done or not?” I say with a blank face but a bite of annoyance leaks into my voice, taking a drag.
“You haven’t changed,” he replies with a shake of his head. “Come on, I’ll show you where everything is.”
I flick my half-smoked cigarette to the ground, stepping on it with my heel before following him back into the clubhouse, the party somewhere near the front of the building not seeming to have let up even if it’s close to dawn. We’re both silent as I follow him through a series of hallways and locked doors.
“Lucy’s off limits.” The words fly out of my mouth like I’m fucking possessed and I try not to externally cringe while Kenzie looks back over to me with one of his casual smiles.
“I thought she wasn’t your bird,” he says with mirth.
“She’s not—but I want her treated like she is.”
“If you say so,” he replies, unlocking a fortified door and leading us into a room filled with monitors, keeping the lights dimmed. Their set up looks a lot more state of the art than I expected.
“Here’s everything you’ll need. And this,” he says pointing to a series of camera feeds, “is for your peace of mind.”
I sweep my gaze over all the different camera angles until I finally find the hallway right outside our bedroom door. I suddenly feel a little less on edge.
“Thanks,” I mutter, heading for the computer. “I need coffee,” I say as an afterthought, settling into one of the chairs.
Kenzie laughs as he heads for the door. “I’ll get a prospect. They’ll bring you whatever you want.” Closing the door behind him, the room falls silent. I let out a long sigh, already twenty steps ahead, thinking of what needs to be done. My gaze lands back on the video of the hallway, wondering why the fuck I’m here when I could be in bed with Lucy. Like a self-inflicted punishment for something I didn’t even fucking do.
I stare at it for a little while longer, wondering if she’s sleeping, imagining her under the sheets, her sleep-warm skin just waiting to be stroked and caressed. Her mouth asking to be kissed… to be licked, and sucked. As some kind of self-soothing reflex, I check her phone for any activity. I wonder if she’s watched any porn since last time, but she hasn’t browsed her phone since we were in the car together. The thought of Lucy watching porn makes my brain overheat, the image of her masturbating in secret making me groan out loud. I clear my throat, shaking my head, and stretch, facing back toward the screen in front of me. Eventually, I fall into a cadence, the clack of the keyboard almost meditative, while my mind stays distracted. Still, my eyes periodically fall on that one camera feed of the hallway, like a lured fish just waiting to be hooked…
Maybe, I already am.
28
Iwake up alone. For a groggy second, I think Bastian came back and then left again, all before I woke up. But it doesn’t take me long to gather that he never came back to the room. I have woken up in enough empty beds to know the difference.