Page 54 of Beautiful Envy

I’m still trying to figure out how I can convince Bubba to let me race him there. I’m sure I’ll figure something out.

Love,

Darcie

CHAPTER 16

Darcie

Sitting on Bubba’s lap, I ran my fingers through his beard as he worked. His eyes were laser-focused on me, making my heart skip a beat. It was a slow day at the shop, and I was helping him with some paperwork. But so far, all we’d managed to do was spread the papers out on the desk and open the program.

“You know, I've heard how you found the guys and invited them into the Brotherhood, but how did you get it started in the first place?”

My hands ran over his smooth head, his eyes closing. One hand was wrapped around my waist, the other covering my thigh. He opened his eyes when I stopped moving my hands, assessing me.

“You really want to know?” he asked.

Nodding, I smiled. “Yeah, I do.”

“The guys told you about Jackson?”

“A little. They mentioned that his leaving was what made you all want to share.”

“Yeah.” He swallowed, his eyes a little sad.

“If you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t have to,” I hedged. I hadn’t meant to pry, but it seemed I’d opened an old scab.

“It’s okay. It doesn’t hurt anymore. Just makes me sad. He was my best friend for the longest time.”

I nodded, laying my head on his chest, hoping it was easier to talk if I wasn’t staring directly at him. Bubba shifted down, his legs spreading a little wider under the desk. He took a deep breath, my body moving with the action as he exhaled.

“Jackson and I grew up together. Our ma’s were best friends. He came to live with us when his mom died in a car wreck. Our friendship grew into that of brothers, and we were inseparable. I feel bad for Ma for having to deal with all the shit we pulled.” He chuckled, the sound low and deep.

“He was the one who got me into motorcycles. His dad wasn’t around much, but had left him an old beat-up Honda. The year we turned eighteen, he saved every penny that summer to fix it up. Once we had the bike running, I knew I needed one too. Mostly just so I wasn’t left behind. One night, over a bottle of cheap beer, we made a pact to always be brothers in every sense of the word. We’d seen a few older guys at the bars with their leathers and patches, and we figured we’d make our own. That was the night the Brotherhood was born.”

I rubbed his chest, not wanting to interrupt his story. Bubba had a dark, smooth voice when he was telling a story, and I enjoyed just listening to him.

“We didn’t like the initiation process some of the other clubs had, so we decided ours would be based on a man's character. We got our own patches and leather, made our symbol, and promised to always put the Brotherhood first. A few guys around town were interested in it for a while, but they’d fade out after a few months when it was no longer fun. When I met Grayson, I had a gut feeling he was the type of man we’d been looking for. The same with Brooks. They were like Jackson and me in many ways, looking for something to belong to that mattered, and the Brotherhood gave them that. We might not be the richest or most dangerous club, but that wasn’t what it was about for us.”

His voice trailed off, the emotion thick. I ran my hand over his chest, hoping to smooth some emotion away with my touch.

“What was it about, then?” I asked.

His eyes dropped down to me, softening around the edges. “Family. We found a family in each other, a brotherhood we could count on. Together, it seemed like we could do anything. I never expected a woman to be the thing that tore us apart. It was why, when he left, I was desperate enough to consider Brooks' insane idea. I didn’t want to endure the pain again of losing one of them. I’d get over my jealousy of watching them with my woman if it meant they were in my life.”

“Did you tell him you didn’t want him to leave?” I asked, curious how his best friend, his brother, could walk away.

“I wanted him to be happy. Mandy made him happy. I’ve never begrudged him for choosing to start a different life.”

“Do you see Jackson or talk to him much?”

He nodded, pushing my hair back. “Yeah. We still talk about once a week. I haven’t seen him and Mandy that much since they moved away. They even have two rugrats now. We’ll have to take a ride this fall and go visit. They’ll love you.”

“I’d like that.” I smiled, the thought of a future with these men warming my heart. Bubba leaned down and kissed my lips, his beard tickling me.

“Do you get jealous?” I asked, curious.

“Not how you’re thinking. It surprised me how happy I was to see you loved and cherished. I was only envious I wasn’t the one to do it.”