Page 41 of Psycho
Chapter Twelve
Evie
I woke up twice in the night to check on Thomas. The first time, I was so disorientated, I believed bringing Thomas home had been a dream. But he was fast asleep in his bed, tucked in safe and sound.
The second time, I just couldn’t help myself. I had to have eyes on him. And that’s where I’ve been since 4 A.M., sitting by his door with my arse long gone numb.
The ache that lived in my chest from missing him is gone, but I’d be lying if I said there wasn’t a layer of anxiety settling into its place. It was true when I told Louis I was terrified of messing up again, but I believed him when he promised he’d be around and wouldn’t let that happen. But the reality is, I can’t rely on him, and that doesn’t sit well with me.
I have Thomas home, I have my new job, and by some stroke of luck, I seem to have Louis. I only see truth in his eyes whenever he tells me anything. With Callum, I could always tell when he was lying. He’d give too much detail about whatever it was he was lying about, and he’d talk real fast.
How am I meant to fit Louis into my life when I have to focus on my son? Thomas needs my full attention, and my doubts have nothing to do with Louis being a Road Wrecker. Callum was into all kinds of dodgy deals, so it’s nothing new to me. The biggest concern I have is that I’ve never had another man around Thomas, apart from his dad. I wonder how he would take to Louis. By nature, my boy is sweet and thoughtful, and while Louis is sweet and thoughtful to me, I see the darkness surrounding him. I don’t know how Thomas would take to him. There’s so much to think about and I’m torn because I’m falling for Louis… hard, but no one will ever top the love I have for my son. He will always come first.
Thomas’s laughter is what warms my heart on this chilly autumn day, and as I chase him around the park, he evades me, climbing up the slide.
“You cheat!” I laugh, trying to catch my breath.
Backing up toward the bench, I go to take a breather when I spot Louis leaning against the railing surrounding the play area. My breath catches in my throat at the sight of him, but my stomach sinks because I know what I have to do.
Keeping my eye on Thomas, now playing with another little boy around the same age, I join Louis.
“How did you find me?”
“I stopped at your house and you weren’t there. I was driving past and saw you.”
Thomas runs after his new friend, laughing, and I clear my throat, ready to get this over with.
“Louis, I can’t see you anymore.”
God, that sounds so lame. I cringe so hard, my body feels like it’s standing on the edge of a cliff. I can feel his stare boring into the side of my face, but I refuse to look at him.
“Why?” he eventually asks.
“Because of Thomas. I can’t lose him again. I can’t…” I trail off, because I can’t keep repeating my thoughts, even though he deserves a full explanation.
“You said his dad is dead, yeah?” I nod, wondering where he’s going with this. “I’m not looking to replace anyone, but I like you a lot, and I won’t be able to stay away. Not after having a taste of you.”
He’s making this so much harder than it needs to be. I mean, we only met a few weeks ago.
“Louis—”
“I’m called Psycho for a number of reasons, one of them being that I don’t give up easily, if at all. I’m figuring you out pretty quickly, and I know you feel something for me. I’m not going to let you hide from it.”
“Louis, please, I do like you, but—”
“No buts. I have to go out of town for a couple of days, but when I get back, I wanna see you.”
Sliding his hand around the back of my neck, he pulls me close, demanding my attention.
“Regardless of my road name, I do have some patience. If you want to slow things down for the kid, I can do that. But don’t ask me to walk away.”
Leaning in, he presses his lips to mine, and like every other kiss, he consumes me.
“I’ll see you in a couple of days.”
I’m about to ask where he has to go when something tugs on my jacket.
“Mummy, who’s he?”