Page 58 of Hogging the Hunk
Escaping to the Solomon Islands seemed an unlikely place I’d run into anyone I knew. I could do good and forget about anything bad that happened in the past year. Easy peasy solution to my misery and woe.
Except Milo was there with me, in every quiet moment. I ached for him in a way that couldn’t be severed by distance. A trip to Mars and he’d still be on my mind.
My voice was unsure when I finally answered Granny. “I suppose one of the main root causes for me fleeing Button Blossom was that I was tired of being everyone’s second choice.”
Granny muted the television. “What do you mean?”
My cheeks puffed as I held back an exhale. “I’ve worked so hard to ensure life has gone according to plan. While Maren got to be the impulsive dreamer, I have always been meticulous and intentional with everything I do in order to be allowed to deviate from what might have otherwise been expected of me.”
“And what was expected of you?”
When I shrugged, I was sure someone had snuck anvils onto my shoulders. “That I’d stay here and help Maren continue the legacy you and Grandpa started.”
Thankfully, Granny wasn’t easily offended, and my confession didn’t rile her up, even though I’d implied I had felt some pressure to be something I wasn’t. “If you haven’t noticed, we Kents pretty much do whatever the heck we feel like. We forge our own paths, no matter what. You know, if my momma had her way, I would have stayed a spinster so I could take care of her in her old age.”
“She didn’t like Grandpa?”
“He won her over, eventually. Only took him about thirty-six years.” I laughed with Granny, and the tension putting my skull in a vise eased. “So, what of your life hasn’t gone according to plan? You graduated high school, had a 4.0 grade point average during your undergrad. Then, you were accepted into medical school on your first try, and finished your residency by twenty-nine. Is there something else you were hoping to do that I’m forgetting about?”
“Yeah. Married to a handsome, successful man, buy a house in the suburbs with a white picket fence and a three stall garage, and have an average number of adorable, intelligent children in my early thirties. Is that so much to ask?”
I stuffed a handful of popcorn into my mouth to stymie the sob that was trying to exit. Granny patted my hand. “I’m not sure where you got the notion that life will fit neatly into the parameters that you’ve been trying to set, but that’s setting yourself up for utter disappointment. Don’t you ever want to be spontaneous?”
“I can be spontaneous. Spontaneity is fun.”
“You sound like you’re giving yourself a pep talk. Relax, Beckett. This isn’t a test.”
I slouched into the overstuffed couch and sighed. “I wish it was. Then maybe I’d know what to expect. I’m good at tests.”
“That’s what I’m trying to get you to understand, darlin’. Not much in life is what you expect. You plan on marrying one guy, who might appear to be perfectly suited for you, but you end up falling in love with a completely different man who surprises you with how good he is for you.”
Swiping my wrist under my nose, I asked, “Are you talking about Greg and Milo?”
“Milo?” Granny bounced to the edge of the seat and her posture straightened. “I was talking about my high school boyfriend, Bob, and how your grandfather waltzed right in and stole my heart before I even knew what was happening.”
“Oh.”
“Hang on a minute. You can’t rewind and pretend like you didn’t say something incriminating now. You have a crush on Milo?”
I growled with exasperation. “Weren’t you the one trying to get me to kiss him at our Christmas party?”
“Sure, Bonita and I were trying to get you to smooch under the mistletoe, but that’s because you were standing next to each other. If you didn’t notice, we got a lot of people to kiss.”
“All couples already as far as I could tell.”
“You haven’t treated Milo like anything other than a friend.”
“He is a friend.”
“A friend who you want to promote to something more?”
She was goading me for details I had been holding close to the chest since I first began suspecting them myself. “It’s complicated.”
“Codswallop. It’s a yes or no question. Are you or are you not wanting Milo to be your beau?”
The frantic beating of my heart was doing damage to every point where I could feel it hammering. It shouldn’t be so difficult to admit that Milo was a great guy and that I liked him. No, I loved him. I just needed the courage to admit it. If not for personal accountability, but also because I needed to work on not fearing the truth.
I swallowed. “Yes.”