Page 31 of There I Find Love

Chapter 12

Clara felt like itmight be prying to question him about his prayer if she asked him about what he’d just prayed. After all, it was a conversation between the Lord and him. Although, he’d allowed her to listen in.

“You know, I hadn’t gone to church in years before I went on Sunday.”

That didn’t surprise her, and as she opened her box of food, she just nodded.

“But the pastor said so many things that resonated with me. That were what I believe, unconsciously or not.”

“That align with your worldview?” she asked.

He nodded. “And I didn’t realize how much of that worldview was formed when I was exposed to church when I was a kid.”

“You rode the bus to church?”

“My parents certainly didn’t take me, but in inner-city Chicago, there are lots of churches that pick kids up and take them to Sunday school. I got involved in one of those and went off and on through junior high. After that, it wasn’t cool. I really loved the teachings, though. It all made sense to me. And while everything else that you learn in the world is pretty much the opposite of what you learn from the Bible, somehow those teachings stuck with me. I... I admit that I spent a lot of time in the Cities doing some research.”

“Research into the Bible?” she asked as she stuck her fork into her lo mein and twirled it around.

“Yeah. Into why I might believe that it was true. After all, it seems like if I believe that there is a God, it makes sense that He left directions for us. Those directions would be the Bible. And if I believe those two things, then it would make sense that I should follow the Bible. Right?”

“Well, yeah. When you put it like that. I think a lot of people don’t have any idea of what the Bible says. Christians don’t even know.”

“It’s a little intimidating to start reading. Someone ought to break it up into sixty-six separate books so that you don’t feel like you’re running a marathon while you’re trying to read.”

“I don’t know that anyone’s ever thought of that, but if you read the Gospels, you get the gist of what Jesus taught.”

“We don’t see the whole picture. See, I’m a global thinker. I like to see everything, the whole picture, and then I break it down into components so that I can build based on what I see in my head as the end result. I need to see the big picture before I break it down into the smaller action items.”

“Action items meaning...”

“The way God wants us to live. Basically, a day by day, hour by hour, thought by thought way of living.”

“Aren’t you missing something?”

“Salvation?”

She nodded. Following the Bible was mostly meaningless unless a person had completely bought into Christianity. In order to do that, they had to acknowledge Jesus as God’s Son and accept his free gift of salvation. It was an easy concept, simple to understand, but hard for so many because it required repentance which was turning from their way of life, following after sin and self, and turning toward the Savior, committing their life to him.

That was the holdup for so many.

Believing wasn’t hard. Accepting a gift wasn’t hard, either. That turning, that conversion, that repentance, the humbleness that required, the admittance of shame and guilt and the knowledge that a person couldn’t save himself, then giving oneself to God for His use... That was where people stumbled.

“A lot of times, pride gets in the way. I’ve often watched as people who are full of pride walk away from the Lord because they just can’t bend their knee.”

“I don’t know that I could have done it when I was younger. I think... I look back, sometimes God takes us on the path and then brings things into our lives at just the right time. If this would have happened...even a year ago, I might not have been ready. But now? I guess I’ve learned enough to know that I don’t know nearly as much as I thought I knew when I started, and I will never know it all.”

She chewed on her lo mein, looking into the dark night, seeing the rolling waves and the lights of the city to the left. It seemed a little surreal that she was sitting in the office on the floor with her boss and he was talking about...getting saved. Repentance. Becoming a Christian. Living a life of service to God. They never talked about religion, and although she knew his politics, they didn’t talk about that, either.

“Are you going to tell me that you just believe? You never question anything?”