Page 20 of Cyrus
“Maybe. Ain’t ever met someone I felt a need to relate to. Until the first time I saw you.” Cyrus didn’t have many expressions and the ones he did were very subtle. Just in the time I’d known him, though, I was noticing a few. He was telling me the truth. On all counts.
“You realize I’m way younger than you. Right? At least a good ten years.”
“Yep. Still want you, Odette. Don’t think you’re gonna talk your way out of this. You’re not. It’s only a matter of time until I convince you to go all in with me. That doesn’t change the fact that you’re still gonna be my old lady.”
“You don’t love me, Cyrus,” I said softly. “I can’t marry a man who doesn’t love me.”
I knew the second I said the words it was a mistake. “But you love me.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You didn’t not say it either. You said you couldn’t marry a man who didn’t love you. That implies you’d have to love him too. It also implies that you love me since you didn’t specify you’d have to love me to marry me.”
“Has anyone ever told you you’re damned frustrating?”
“All the damned time, baby.”
“I don’t love you. But I could see myself loving you given enough time.”
He studied me before shaking his head. “I can’t tell if you’re lying or not. I’m going with not since this is moving faster than you’re comfortable with.”
“What about you? Could you see yourself loving me?”
For the first time since I’d met him, Cyrus didn’t have an answer. In fact, he looked confused as all get out. Like he didn’t understand the question.
“I’m not sure.”
“Ouch.”
“No,” he said hastily. “That’s not what I mean. I’m not sure, you know, what that is.” He cleared his throat, looking away. Embarrassed? “Love.”
“I’m surprised you’d admit that.”
“I’ll never keep things from you, Odette. I want to give you what you need. I’m just not sure how with this.”
“Then we should slow down.”
Immediately he got that stubborn mien that secretly made me smile. “We’re not slowing down. This is happening.”
I couldn’t help myself. I laughed. Seriously. The man was like a kid with a new toy he absolutely refused to give up.
“This isn’t a decision I can make on the fly.”
“Like I said. There’s no decision for you to make. You wanted me to take over? That’s what I’m doing.”
“Life or death, Cyrus. That means this is one thing you’re not taking over. Not yet. What if you abuse me? Mentally or physically. What if you cheat? What if I wake up one morning and realize that I simply go, ‘God, I can’t stand the fact that you have to have everything in the house just so, and it’s making me crazy that I can’t leave my dirty underwear on the bathroom floor for more than the fifteen minutes it takes me to shower?’ What if I can’t stand living with you because you’re stubborn and need to control everything around you, because I can see both those traits coming out in spades right now.”
“I hurt you in any way, but especially if I hit you or berate you or humiliate you or any other of a million things a person could do to mentally abuse someone, you go to Sting or any member of the Iron Tzars. Or any of the old ladies. Sting will deal with me and the whole club will protect you. If I ever hit you, my life will be forfeit. No questions asked.”
“That gives me a lot of power.”
“It does. But if you were the kind of person to have me killed in cold blood, I wouldn’t want you with me.”
“Again, Cyrus. You don’t know me. Which is my whole point here. Twenty-four hours isn’t nearly enough time.”
“It is for me. If you’d let yourself turn off your brain and act on instinct, I think you’d realize it’s enough time for you too.”
Chapter Six