Page 66 of Her Filthy Grump
Chapter Forty-Two
Kameron
I clasp the steering wheel, and if there was daylight, I would be able to see the whites of my knuckles. The only sound in the pickup is from the air conditioning as Layla stares out the side window.
Everything I said was true, but there were also good times. I was never verbally or emotionally abused. We had huge Christmas parties. When dad took his vacation, we’d go to an amusement park or stay in a hotel. I shouldn’t have been such an asshole. It isn’t her fault that my mom left.
I flip on the blinker to turn onto my street, and the clicking sounds like a bomb about to detonate. My stomach rolls as sweat beads pop on my forehead. Is this the end?
My breath catches, and I try to swallow over the lump in my throat. I wouldn’t blame her if the second I put the vehicle into park, she runs to her car and never looks back. I would deserve it, but I can’t imagine not having her in my life.
If she’s willing to stick around after that display of childish bullshit, she deserves a medal. The gravel crunches under my tires, and I slide to a stop. When her hand clutches the door handle, my heart sinks to my feet. It’s too late. How can I blame her? “Listen, I’m sorry.”
She twists to face me with eyes swimming in unshed tears. “I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have said anything. I don’t know much about you and shouldn’t have pushed you to share something you weren’t comfortable with just because I was selfish.”
“No, you weren’t.” I grab the hand that isn’t on the door and hold it in mine. “You weren’t wrong for asking. We’re dating. Or were dating.” I sigh, “I shouldn’t have held back that part of my past. It’s a big reason for who I am today. It’s why I fear commitment and have always vowed to never get married or have a family.”
She bites her bottom lip and nods. “I understand completely. If I had your experiences, I would feel the same.” Her eyes dart to her vehicle parked beside mine. “I should go.”
“Don’t.” I swallow. “I don’t want to be alone. I want to be with you. I shouldn’t drag you down the rabbit hole with me, but I can’t seem to stop.”
“Okay.”
Just like that, she’s ready to jump in feet first and let me ruin her. The realization floors me. I lean over the console between us and cup the back of her head.
Somehow, I’ve got to keep us from hitting rock bottom. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know the first thing about committed relationships, but….” I inhale. “I love you. You bring light into my life. The only real light I’ve ever had.”
Tears escape from the corners of her eyes, and then a slow smile curves up to her cheeks. “I love you, too.”
“I will do my best to be a better person and not disappoint you.” I swipe the tear onto the pad of my index finger. “Thank you for pushing me to share my past. It’s a wound I don’t like to open, but it needed to be said.”
Her smile grows larger, and she cups my face. “I promise to be there for you to help you through the ugly times.”
All the heaviness of the evening evaporates as I place my lips on hers. Her mouth is soft and willing against mine. There’s nothing I’d rather do than be the man she deserves. To be the person who fights for her. “Let’s go inside.”
Her face is full of hope and happiness. I put that there. I’ve got to live up to that expectation.
“I thought you’d never ask.” She grins and yanks open the door.
“I told you a gentleman opens the door.” I hop down to the ground.
“I’d rather you spend the night running your hands and mouth over me and bringing me to multiple orgasms.”
“Deal.” I slam the door shut and run to her side of the pickup. After I open her door, I tip out my chin. “I’ll gladly give up my door rights to have sex rights.”
She jumps and wraps her arms around my neck. “You own my body and soul.”
I swoop her into my arms as a neighborhood dog barks. “Doll, you tempt me to do some dirty acts to you here in the driveway, but my neighbors will call the police.”
Her mouth sucks down on the column of my neck as I walk up the stairs to the front door. “It’s dark. Who’s going to notice?”
The back-porch light of my neighbor’s house, the one with the yammering dog, flips on. “Damn it, Brutus. Shut up.”
“That’s who’d notice.” I chuckle and drag the key out of my pocket, which isn’t as easy as it sounds while carrying her.
My entire body feels light and full of joy as I snap open the lock. Sharing my past with someone, getting all the ugliness out, and telling Layla I love her seems to be the magical elixir for happiness. Who knew?
“Fine,” she sighs dramatically. “I’ll save my tongue lashing for inside because I have some great ideas in store for you.”