Page 34 of Songs of Vice
“No, it was nothing more than a summer romance.” I couldn’t help a smile. Dawson had waited at corners for me, snuck me sweet cakes from his family’s bakery, and was the first person I’d made love with. And that’s what it was—love. Even if it was trembling, unsure, and immature. We’d had a beautiful summer together, and I wept bitterly when his family insisted on an arranged marriage for him. There was also relief, though. How could I marry a man that didn’t know I was magical? If we had a child, she’d be a siren. It wasn’t fair to him. It was my first taste of heartbreak, as tart as the lemon pies his father made. But there was a sweetness in it, as well. That summer would always hold a place in my heart. I worried it might be the peak of my life.
Sai’s eyes had taken a predatory slant, his voice heavy. “You enjoyed living in Madalia?”
“I loved it.” I slipped the locket beneath my top. If I wasn’t so uncertain of where we stood, I would think he was jealous. That was ridiculous. He hardly knew me. “What about you? If you could have any life you’d wish for, what would you choose?”
The intensity of his gaze made him seem exceedingly close, the aromatic smell of the Bakarwadi lingering between us. I took another bite to avoid staring at him. God, what had I gotten myself into? A mess. But hopefully one worth it in the end. If I could return home—for that’s what Madalia was to me—then I’d be happy. Dawson would have married, and I wouldn’t reconnect with him. I would never marry. It wouldn’t be fair to the human. But I could be content living safely in Madalia. Sai’s voice was a caress of a sound when he spoke, and I shivered. “Do you think the answer to that can change?”
“How do you mean?”
“Maybe if you go somewhere or meet someone”—he ran his hand over the shadow of a beard lining the sharp lines of his jaw—“that changes the answer.”
“What would you want out of life if you could change anything?”
His gaze dropped to my lips, and he licked his own. “I’d not be a thief.”
“What?” The smooth glide of his tongue had distracted me. I’d forgotten what I’d even asked him.
“If I could choose any life, I wouldn’t do jobs like this anymore.”
“Can’t you quit?”
He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “I’m afraid it’s not that simple. Come on.” He jumped to his feet. “We should go. I’ll find us an actual dinner, so we don’t starve.”
I took the last bite of my Bakarwadi and closed my eyes to savor it as he had. The flavors made me wish I could capture it in a song I could play whenever I wished. I doubt I’d ever taste something as intensely delicious as that again. I opened my eyes to find Sai watching me, his jaw clenched. As I swallowed the food stuck in my throat. I stood, brushed down the skirt, and tried to think of something light to ease the intensity. “You never said what our role is.”
Sai’s expression broke, and he slipped a hand into a pocket. “We’re going to see the Naga.”
“Who’s that?”
“Someone who’s capable of the level of magic we’ll need to pull this off.”
“You sound nervous.”
Sai released a breath. “The Naga is complicated, but it will be all right. It’s getting late; let’s find food before we lose our chance.”
CHAPTERFIFTEEN
NEIA
Elisa released a shuddering breath,and her fingers clenched tighter into my hair. I gripped her thighs and pulled her closer before running a hand along her side, following the flow of her hip, the line of her waist, and cupped the soft mound of her breast. She cried out and her body trembled against mine. When she grew still, I chuckled and kissed the corner of her knee before crawling up beside her and pulling her into my arms.
She tucked against me like a key fitting into a lock. Maybe there was something to her Attala belief. I could believe this woman was made for me. Strands of her auburn hair stuck to the sweat on her forehead, and I combed them back and kissed her temple.
She released a contended sigh and sunk farther into the shitty bed of the rented room we’d taken the night before in the village next to the mine. The room had bare floorboards and pocked walls with two small beds, because clearly two women couldn’t betogether. God forbid. My jaw tensed at that thought. I wanted to charge the world and fight the injustices for Elisa.
On the other hand, it meant I got to hold her closer. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad thing.
“Do you think this job is actually a good idea?” Elisa asked, her voice a whisper that scarcely rose over the crackling sounds of carts and clomping of horses which murmured in through the window.
“What do you mean?”
“It’s dangerous.”
“It’s honorable, to get Prince Shaan’s zevar back.”
She blew out a breath and rolled to lay flat, pushing me to the edge of the mattress. “That’s true and I wish for him to have it returned to him. The Seelie have slapped our leaders in the face with their actions. But”—her tone grew quiet again—“I left the Seelie for a reason, Nei.”
I studied the creamy line of her shoulders in the gray of morning light then raised my gaze to meet her eyes again. I didn’t understand how anyone could ever see danger or something bad in Elisa. She was as gentle and kind as a spring breeze.