Page 69 of Spark
“Find ways to make peace with my life,” I replied darkly.
“Oh? By doing what?”
“By enjoying what little freedoms I have been granted, however long they may last.”
Darren sighed. “You’re really expecting me to take this away from you.”
“I have learned to always expect the worse with you… so yes.”
“You only have yourself to blame for that. If you’d listened to me months ago and settled, you’d be in a much happier state of mind.”
“I disagree, but then again what do I know? I’m just a worthless whore with a tight hole to fuck.”
Darren yanked me toward him, locking me against his chest and nearly snarling down at me.
“The man who uttered those words to you is dead because of them. So what makes you think I will tolerate them when they leave your mouth?”
“Because he was right,” I snapped bitterly. “The only thing that validates my life is you, and I hate you for it! I fucking hate—”
Before I could finish my rant, Darren tugged me closer and kissed me with such force, I nearly lost my breath. His mouth was soft against mine yet firm in its mission to distract me. Darren’s hands gripped my hips, not giving me an inch to move while my hands remained planted on his wide chest, my blood rushing through my veins while my stomach knotted with demonic little butterflies.
Releasing me from his kiss, his forehead lingered against mine while I fought to find my breath.
“You can hate me all you want; it won’t change anything. But you are not ever to hate yourself. You are worth more to me than my own fucking life, so don’t pretend for a second that the opinion of a dead foot soldier measures your worth. He was wrong.”
I blinked. It was the only thing I could do to respond to what he had just said. The intensity of his eyes told me how serious he was and that I should probably shut up about it.
“Now, I never want to hear you say shit like that again. Do you understand me?”
I pursed my lips in rebellion. “Yes.”
“Yes, what?” he snapped.
“Yes, Darren.”
“Good. Come on.”
The argument and kiss long forgotten, Darren strolled the woods with me. I showed him the clearing where I practiced yoga and meditation. I even showed him the tree where I’d forgotten his watch. Throughout the entire tour, I prayed like hell my little fox family wouldn’t make themselves known. I knew that would probably be the end of them. I kept my eyes peeled for anything gray in hopes I could distract Darren into looking the opposite way, but it was difficult with how observant he was.
His eyes scanned every direction, every rodent that moved, every bird that flew by, and every branch that swung in my direction. I kept catching his eyes glancing up for several seconds at the trees as we passed them—probably wondering where he could hide the security cameras he was probably going to install so he could watch me from afar.
“This can’t be all you do out here,” he suddenly said, sounding irritated. “Even I would find myself bored after a while.”
He was looking for a reason! Goddamn snoop!
“Not when you’re only allowed an hour,” I retorted. “It goes by faster than you think.”
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “There’s something missing. Something you’re not sharing.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. We’ve circled the entire area.”
“Your eyes keep whipping in every direction like you’re waiting for something to show up and you don’t want me to see it. You also keep purposely avoiding a certain area. I want to know why.”
Shit, he was good. I was avoiding the fox den like the plague, slowly directing him away from it as best I could and hoping to God one of those fuzzy little fuckers didn’t show their face right now. I was afraid that if I showed him, he’d see them as a threat and exterminate them. Maybe I could distract him with another argument?
“And your eyes keep wandering to every damn tree like you’re wondering if it’s a good place to hide a camera,” I retorted.
“Jaden, you’d better show me what you’re hiding right now, or you won’t be coming back out here. End of story,” he threatened.