Page 21 of Bad Moon Rising
His eyes bore into mine.
I realize my mom is saying something to me, but I don’t hear her.
I raise my chin and meet his gaze, and something inside me snaps.
I run for the door and fling it open. “Brooks!” I yell, barrelling toward him as fast as I can in the fishtail skirt. “I want to talk to you.”
His eyes grow wide as I bear down on him, so wide that I feel myself falling into them, losing myself in him. I don’t know myself as I grab his arm and yank him into the alley beside the boutique. The woman calls out a relieved “thank you!” as she races away with her stroller.
Brooks glares at me like he doesn’t know me, like I’m some mythological creature to be feared. Forks and spoons cascade from his hands and clatter on the pavement at our feet. He manages to hold on to a few under one arm. My fingers dig into his wrist. I want to shake him, hurt him, anything to make him see me again.
“I don’t know what’s crawled up your ass and turned you into such a dick,” I snap. And suddenly all the things I’ve longed to say to him come pouring out. “You have no right to treat me like this. You’re the one who’s supposed to be the adult. You promised you’d look after all of us. And then you leave the twins to fend for themselves. You leave me. You go off to Attica, or wherever broken lost souls go these days, and we needed you. And then you stroll on back into our lives and act like I’m with one with the problem? All of that I can forgive because you’re you. Because I know you, Brooks. I know that underneath your tough guy bullshit is a scared boy who lost his parents and had to grow up too fast. I know you hate me because of what happened at my birthday, and that’s okay. But did you have to turn the twins against me? They’re all I have, and now they won’t even talk to me, and I know it’s because of you. Maybe you don’t need anyone or anything, but I need them, and I miss them so much. Do you hate me so much that you have to take away the one thing in my life that—”
“I don’t hate you, Lily.”
He growls the words. His whole body is shaking. He sounds like an animal, wild, caged, untamed, on the edge of losing control.
I step back, but I can’t let go of his arm. His skin sizzles under my fingers.
“What then? Why are the twins barely talking to me? Why won’t you even look at me?” I hate that my voice comes out as a desperate plea.
“I’m looking at you now.”
That’s not strictly true. ‘Looking’ isn’t an accurate description for the way Brooks’s eyes sweep over me, the way the vein in his temple twitches, or the way his whole body has gone rigid. He’s devouring me with his eyes.
And it certainly shouldn’t be enough to make my body react the way it does—my tongue is dry, my skin feels hot and clammy, and between my legs…well it’s a whole party down there, complete with cake and balloon animals.
I swallow. Again and again I try to swallow down the intensity of his gaze, but whatever point I was making gets lost in the dark depths of his eyes.
Brooks leans in close, so close that his breath dances across my lips. My back hits the wall, and rough brick grinds into my bare shoulders. I don’t have to look down to know my nipples are hard, and it’s mortifying to think that Brooks can see that but he’s not looking at my tits. He’s looking into my eyes like he’s ready to eat my soul.
“You want the truth, Lily Dean?” His lip curls back into this hard, panty-melting grin. “The truth is that I’m thinking about pushing you up against this wall and thrusting my tongue inside you until you scream my name. But you’re not ready for me.”
Oh.
Oh.
But I’m so fucking angry at him that I can ignore the fact that he’s making my skin burn with heat, and conjuring memories of the girl I was two years ago, the girl who desired him as more than a big brother.
“Who are you to tell me what I’m ready for?” I yell. “I wanted you to be my first kiss. You made me beg for it, and then you…you…”
I struggle for the words. The closeness of him, the sandalwood scent of him swirling around me, the curve of his lip as he bears down on me, it’s all too much. He’s too much…
“Maybe I’m so messed up that I like hearing you beg.” That smile again. So hot and dangerous. “And I wasn’t talking about kissing your lips.”
My whole face is on fire, even as I press my legs together in some attempt to call the cops on the party that’s turning into a blowout.
Brooks reaches up with his free hand and strokes my reddened cheek. His touch is pure fire and sin. “See? So sweet and innocent. This is why I can’t have you, Lily. You’re made for a brighter life than this. You can do so much better than a broken piece of shit like me.”
“Don’t talk like that,” I manage to choke out. “You’re not broken.”
“Oh, sweet Lily,” his voice is ragged, filled with pain. “You have no idea.”
I don’t know how it happens, but suddenly his lips are on mine, hot as fire and twice as deadly. My head jerks back, pressing against the bricks under the force of his kiss as he kicks cutlery and silver serving platters out of the way.
Brooks is kissing me.
My first kiss.