Page 84 of Hollow

I sit up in my bed. The candles I had lit on my desk have gone out. It takes a moment for my eyes to adjust to the black, the moon’s light faint.

The last few nights I’ve heard Marie’s voice, heard the thump of the woman outside in the hall. At this point it’s obvious it’s not a prank. I wish it was. That would be so much easier to deal with.

“You can’t hide from the truth,” Marie whispers and I feel cold breath at my neck.

I yelp and scramble out of bed, whirling around to see nothing at all.

“What do you want?” I ask, my voice shaking slightly. It’s a stupid question. She never answers. Neither does the woman I am certain is Vivienne Henry.

There’s only silence now. Only darkness.

I sigh and sit down in my chair, putting my head in my hands. A man could be driven to madness this way. I have to wonder if any of the other teachers are haunted by ghosts here, whether ones from their pasts or ones from the school. Is that why Vivienne Henry killed herself? Did they drive her to madness?

But Marie’s ghost has always followed me. The opium kept her at bay for a long time but now that I’m clear-headed, she’s back. Taunting me. Reminding me of what I did to her. Of what I can never ever escape from.

It’s enough to dig my nails into my bare thighs. What I wouldn’t give for some opium right now. Just enough to let me sleep, to help me escape for just one night. But I know that if I did leave the school to find some, that I probably wouldn’t be allowed back in. I’m sure the Sisters have a way of finding out. They don’t seem to be paying much attention to me while I’ve been here but I wouldn’t risk losing my job over it.

Besides, it would only cloud my brain. I need to be thinking as sharply as possible if I want to be able to help Brom regain his memories. I feel like I’m a waste of a human being if I can’t be useful at all times.

I need light, I think. I don’t want to sleep, don’t want to be in the darkness anymore. That’s where my demons live.

I get up and strike a match and light the candles along my desk.

I drop the match.

Outside the window, between me and the lake, is a woman dressed in white. She’s twirling on the shore, her head back to the sky, long dark hair whipping around her, lost in some sort of frenzied worship. She looks young and familiar but I can’t quite place her.

Then three people in hooded black cloaks come out towards her. I assume they are the sisters but I can’t be sure. They are moving fast, urgently. They grab the twirling girl and the minute they put their hands on her she automatically goes still. Her head dips down as if she’s fallen asleep on her feet, her hair falling over her face.

I watch as they lead her away from the lake and bring her to the left, possibly towards the cathedral, until they disappear from my sight.

I get up, a prickle of unease on my scalp, and bring out my salts and black tourmaline from my drawer. It wouldn’t hurt to ward the room tonight, just in case.

***

When I get to my morning class I’m on edge, having not slept for the rest of the night. The black tourmaline works well for protection but the properties of the crystal are intense and not always conducive for sleeping.

But the moment I lay my eyes on Kat, sitting in the front row, the exhaustion leaves me.

How stunning this woman is. How lucky that she’s mine.

Except she is talking to the student Paul with a rapturous look on her face and that causes jealousy to spike through me. I had told her I could share her with Brom if it came to that, but anyone else and I feel the selfish urge to claim her as mine. I know better, of course, being her teacher, but if I had no shame I would march right over to her and kiss her so deeply there would be no doubt in anyone’s mind of what we are to each other.

My sweet witch has consumed my soul.

I manage to hold it together, reminding myself that she’s allowed to talk to the other students and that there’s no reason to lose my sanity over it. It’s just the depth of my feelings for her is starting to surprise me. Ever since we had sex in the stables it’s been torture to stay away from her. A few times we’ve come together this week in secret but it’s only made me want her more. She’s become more addicting that any drug and far more dangerous because she’s affecting more than just my body or my mind but reaching the deep and terrible places inside me, the places I hide from.

She wants me to be a better man for her.

As if she hears my pining she meets my eyes and gives me the shyest of smiles, quick and delicate, and I know it’s going to be an especially long class today.

Thankfully it’s over before I go insane. I’ve locked the door and it’s just the two of us in the classroom and I have her spread out over my desk like a feast.

“Tell me what you want, Kat,” I say to her, her dress bunched around her waist, her hips at the edge of the table where I’m prepared to lick every inch of her.

“You usually tell me what you want,” she says through a breathless laugh.

“I know,” I say, running my fingers up her thighs, teasing her soft, sensitive skin until goosebumps appear. “As I said I can be selfish but I want to give you what you want.” I lower my chin until my mouth is inches from her sweet cunt. “You’ve been far too generous with me, indulging my desires.”