Page 31 of Blackout

Zach nodded.

‘How?’ I whispered. ‘How do you know?’

‘When I saw you seated at my bar that first night you rolled into town, I thought maybe I recognised you. Then I couldn’t help but wonder why I felt a connection to you, and you seemed oddly familiar. When you passed out, I didn’t want to let you out of my sight, and taking you to my birthday party meant I could spend some more time with you, talk to you and get to know you.’ Zach stopped for a breath, then he smirked before he continued. ‘When I was told a debit card was left behind, I was thrown for a loop when hearing the name on the card. Then all I could think of was the girl who lived next door with pigtail braids and red-framed glasses and sang with her sister and Dad every chance she got.’

So Zach had been suspicious from the moment I drank myself under the bar. ‘You never said anything.’

‘I was trying to wrap my head around seeing you again after all these years. You disappeared, and I told myself if I ever saw you again, I would be cautious. But after spending the last couple of days together, holding your hand and seeing your tattoo, I didn’t want to be cautious anymore.’ Silence filled the cab of Zach’s truck, then he said, ‘I don’t want to let go of your hand.’

I gasped at Zach’s whispered words. I liked that he didn’t want to let go of my hand. I wanted to hold him as close to me as he was willing to hold me close to him.

‘Zach.’ It was all that came out as what else was there to say. I was not surprised Zach had seen my tattoo just above my left hip. I had stripped out of my ‘Babe’ tee-shirt after being covered in sand from our walk down to the river.

‘You inspired me, Harley, every time we talked down the side of my house. I remembered the day I gave you my dragonfly sketch, it was the day after one flew right past us. That sketch was my first and from that day I started carrying a sketch book around with me. I would sketch the little things around me. When the land for Black’s Bar and Grill came up for redevelopment, I started sketching how I wanted the bar to look.’

‘That’s amazing, Zach.’ It was wonderful to hear that Zach had continued to sketch long after I had disappeared and had turned those sketches into inspiration for his bar. What he had done in the years I had been absent impressed me. It would be nice to be as successful as Zach and be as proud of what he’d achieved since high school. If there was one thing I knew now that I didn’t know before I drove myself here was that a few things in my life were going to change.

‘You have my dragonfly sketch tattooed on your hip.’ Zach’s words filled the cab of his truck, a hint of curiousness in his voice. Maybe Zach thought his old next-door neighbour didn’t have enough courage to get a tattoo. Maybe he just wanted to know the story behind my reason for getting a tattoo in the first place.

I reminisced of a simpler time with my sister. ‘Addison found your sketch amongst my things when I moved into my own place. She said I should get it tattooed on me and never have to worry about ever losing your sketch. Addison even dared me, but I knew she was just pushing me to try something new.’.

‘It’s beautiful,’ Zach said of his sketch on my hip.

‘You like it? I made the tattooist copy your dragonfly exactly as you drew it, then she inked it on my skin.’ What Zach thought of my tattoo meant a lot to me.

‘I love the way the tail curves with your hip, babe.’ Zach still had hold of my hand. A warmness that I hadn’t felt in ten years rushed through me, and I wasn’t ashamed to admit that I liked it.

I took a deep breath and pushed my words out softly. ‘You’ll forever be a part of me.’

Zach turned his trademark raised eyebrow towards me and smirked. He liked that there was a piece of him on my skin. He gently squeezed my fingers then brought them up to his lips to kiss my fingertips again. I wasn’t used to being this vulnerable in conversation or with my emotions, then I remembered Zach’s lips on mine and I felt the electricity run through me again. I no longer wanted to feel vulnerable.

I wanted that spark from our kiss earlier, the feel of electricity in my veins to never fade, and I wanted to hold onto the warm and heady feeling I got when Zach was close to me. But was I bold enough to admit to Zach that I wanted to explore where this was going between the two of us? Give ourselves a chance to explore the relationship we never got to start ten years ago? I wanted to feel the rollercoaster ride of emotions I had yet to experience in my life but only wanted to with the man who sat next to me in this truck.

‘When did you realise I was your old neighbour?’ Zach asked as I took back my hand. I didn’t care that I was letting my guard down reminiscing with Zach. All that mattered was that he was right beside me.

‘Your number plate and the colour of your truck made me curious. From the moment you got in your truck, before we had left Black’s Bar and Grill to head to your party, I was imagining you without a beard and longer hair. And if there was a possibility that you were Zach Black, my next-door neighbour from way back when. But it wasn’t until I heard Andy say Mr Black a few times that the penny dropped.’

I explained this, all the while taking in the man in the driver’s seat. He was so handsome, even though all I could see was the side of his face.

‘Ah, Andy!’ Zach said, like he knew Andy would give him a hard time whenever he could.

‘So proper.’ I laughed a little at the man who was Zach’s head of security and apparently liked to keep Zach on his toes.

Then I heard Zach say, ‘What happened, Harley? I remember you were off to Melbourne for two weeks, but you never came back. I never forgot that kiss goodbye, our only kiss.’

Zach’s words took me back to what happened that night long after the kiss we shared.

All of a sudden, I felt a little uneasy, I hadn’t spoken about what had happened to anyone, and now Zach wanted to know about that night. Could I do this? I had to do this. My heart sped up and I felt a little dizzy. ‘No way,’ I told myself. ‘You will not have a meltdown here. Take a fucking deep breath.’

‘Harley, you disappeared, like off the face of the earth ten years ago. There was a massive gap where I didn’t get to see you, the girl next door, and share more of your kisses. We are stuck in my truck for the next couple of hours.’ There was side-eye and a cheeky half-grin on his too-adorable face to be able to resist filling Zach in. ‘Time to spill, don’t you think?’

I kind of did owe Zach that much.

I took a couple more of deep breaths. ‘I… I…’ I stumbled over my words, ‘I have never talked to anyone about what happened ten years ago. My grandparents became mine and Addison’s temporary guardians. They gave us a routine that my mother couldn’t, and what happened was never discussed at the dinner table. Even Addison and I didn’t talk about it.’ And no one had ever asked what I knew about that night.

‘Harley, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.’

I loved that Zach didn’t push for an explanation as to why I’d disappeared. But it was time I spoke up and talked to someone about what I had been holding in, pushing down, bottling up. I needed to ease the cracks that had begun to show.