Page 22 of The Scout

“I need to go,” she said, standing. “Jimmy is going to be home soon.”

“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Hannah studied me.

“At the reunion.”

“Right, I almost forgot, and I’m on the committee.”

Of course she was. “Why don’t I pick you up? We can go together. Unless you have a date.”

“As a matter of fact, I do.”

Crossing my arms defensively in front of my chest, she rolled her eyes. “With Mia. She’s my date.”

The snarky look that flashed across her face had me glaring. “How is Mia? Still causing trouble?” When we were in school, if anyone could pull Hannah out of her comfort zone, it was Mia.

“She’s great. Divorced. He was a jackass, so no loss there. She lives in a cute apartment in town.” Hannah fiddled with the edge of her sleeve. “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

“Sounds good. I’ll see you then. Tell Jimmy—”

Her raised eyebrows silenced me.

“Never mind.”

We crossed the floor, my hand automatically going to rest on her lower back. That same charge of energy that only she could impose on me ran up my arm. She opened the door and turned toward me. “I’m not going to keep you two apart, Cash. I just need to figure some things out first.”

Nodding, I thanked her for that right before I leaned down and kissed her cheek. “Good night, Hannah.”

“Good night, Cash.”

She was still the most beautiful woman in the world. Even when she was pissed off, she was gorgeous—maybe even more so. But it was her heart that I fell in love with all those years ago. Her good, generous, kind heart ... the one that I broke.

I’d never felt like such an idiot as I did when she’d explained everything to me. I still didn’t understand why I never received any communication from her, but if I didn’t have my head so far into the clouds, putting my all into making and then staying on the team, I would have thought to call her. It hadn’t been that I completely forgot about her—I didn’t. I couldn’t. Yet that was exactly how she felt, and I couldn’t blame her.

Then there was Jimmy. I couldn’t even begin to imagine how he felt about his father, about me. Yes, Hannah said he idolized me, but that was Cash Jameson, the baseball star. Not Cash Jameson, the dad who had never acknowledged him, who didn’t even know how much he weighed at birth.

Fuck.I popped open a beer, sat on the couch, and took a long swig. The weighty realization that I had a son hit me over and over again. Despite feeling a bit numbed by shock, autopilot kicked in, and I did my best not to freak out. Once Jimmy learned the truth, I’d never want him to feel as though I didn’t want him. Or that the news of him being mine had been negative. I also didn’t want him to think I disliked his mom. For a couple of reasons—one, it wasn’t true, and two, he had enough on his plate. Having him think that his mom and I were at odds would only make this worse.

Maybe a piece of parenting was instinctual, and that was the part of my brain that kicked in. The other had to be terror and confusion because at that very second, those were the emotions swirling in my head. Fear that I’d screw up and confusion for all the missed time.

I scrubbed my hands over my hair, grabbed my phone, and called Cal. When he didn’t answer the first time, I called again.

“Hey. Sorry, Thor had a little accident.”

“You said he was potty-trained.”

“No, no. He is. The bird freaked him out.”

“Bird?”

“Yeah, no big deal. It’s gone now.”

“There’s a bird in my house?”

“Was. Therewasa bird in your house. Anyway, all crises are averted. Right, Thor?” His voice morphed into that weird tone again. “Yes, it is. No more crisis. Uncle Cash should relax.” Cal chuckled. “Sorry, he’s just so cute.” He cleared his throat. “How’s things? Did you win the game? Did you see Hannah? Man, she was a knockout. So was her other friend. What was her name? Gia? Kia?”

“Mia.”