Page 88 of Redemption
Her head perks up and I see a flash of interest in her eyes. “That’s why you’re here?”
I regard her.No.
“Eat. Or I’m gonna force it down your throat.”
“Oh, how sweet,” she scowls. “You care.”
I glare at her until she shrugs and starts to eat.
Kerry
I keep pissing him off. I realize I’m going to have to act softer, nicer, to try to set my plan in motion. My whole body tingles from our previous banter. I was afraid to tick him off too much, but at the same time it was thrilling in an unexpected way.
The food’s good. Too good. I haven’t eaten anything this delicious in years. And he cooked. Why couldn’t he have been just a normal guy? Why did I have to fall for a monster? A pang of sadness rips through my chest. I’ll never again have that innocent first meeting we had. Certainly not with him, but I won’t have it with anyone. I won’t be able to trust anyone ever again.
Ironically enough, by letting me take that bath, and forcing me to eat, he’s helped me to revitalize and regain some strength. Not starving anymore, clean, warm, and with fresh clothes on, I can think again. My ankle still pulses with pain and I could have used a couple of Advil, but I couldn’t find the bottle.
I have a plan. It’s risky. But it can work. I have to make him trust me, just enough not to lock us in my bedroom again. I’ll have to perform better than ever in the deception that has been my life for so long.
“Thanks. It tasted… it was really good.” My cheeks heat up at how false I sound and look down at my plate but I saw a brief glint of surprise in his eyes. The embarrassment is for real, but it suits me fine to show it.
Cecilia has slithered out of her chair already and is running around, giddy, happy, blissfully unaware of the tension in the room, bouncing on the couch, crawling under the table, off into the bedroom for unknown adventures and then back out again.Good, drain that energy. It’ll make you sleep better.
“Thanks. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” He wipes his mouth, his eyes never leaving mine.
My skin crawls under his scrutiny and I itch to flee the table. I collect the three plates and dart up. “I’ll do the dishes. It’s the least I can do.” I give him my best look of innocence, almost batting my eyelashes, fighting not to overdo it.
Christian narrows his eyes and waits a tad too long to answer. My courage sinks like a stone. He’s too good. He’s gonna see right through me and I’ll never make it.
“Sure.” He leans back and smiles.
I almost drop the plates in surprise.
He gets up and walks over to my armchair, pushing it across the floor until it sits opposite the kitchen entrance, giving him full view over me and what I’m doing. Picking up a book, he flips it open to the first page and pretends to start reading, his eyes not moving along the lines of text.
My back tingles from knowing he’s watching me as I clean the table and the kitchen. My voice is the perfect blend of sugar and hesitation when I walk up to him after I’m done tucking away the remains. “Christian.”
He looks up from his book,Of Mice and Men. Good choice at least. For some reason I’d never have pictured him reading crap literature anyway. “Mm-hmm?”
“What do we do now? What do you want from me?”
If he’s surprised, he hides it well. He looks over at a still hyperactive Cece. “I think we’ll have all the time we need once she’s in bed, don’t you? Do what you normally do. I’m really getting into this.” He waves with the book and smirks.
I’m still completely convinced he hasn’t read a word. “You said…” Unease flits through my chest. “You wanted to talk?”
“Well… you’re not going anywhere, are you?”
A stab of fear shoots through me.He knows!I have to force a smile. “Doesn’t seem like it.”
I smile at him whenever I get a chance, but funny enough, now that Iwantto get close, he seems to distance himself. He keeps himself occupied with the book the whole evening, but it suits me just fine. Doing rounds randomly, pretending to clean up the place, I collect the sleeping potion and all the clothes I can find for Cece and myself, and gather all the items under my bed. My mouth is dry as sandpaper and my heart pounds. Iknowhe’ll find out I’m up to something. He’s not stupid. I know I won’t make it. But I’m not worthy of being her mother if I don’t try.
I read to Cece about the hedgehog and the rabbit, silent tears trickle down my cheeks as I tell the simple story I know so well. She falls asleep like she should with me right next to her. I’m so tired. Even though I’m sitting up I fall asleep over and over and jerk awake every time, my heart pounding wildly, afraid I’ll have missed the window of opportunity. Leaning over the edge of the bed, I reach for the pile of clothes. Yes, they’re still there. Time to act. Time for deception.
He has moved to the couch and for a moment I think he’s fallen asleep. I hold my breath as I watch him. He’s so beautiful. I’ve tried to forget the pull he has on me, that low rumbling voice that makes my insides melt, the dark eyes that both frighten and entice. His chest rises and falls in a slow steady rhythm, but when I tiptoe closer he lifts his head from the pillow and looks at me, his eyelids heavy, his gaze lazy through a curtain of dark hair, sending a jolt through my belly. Even knowing what he is, what he does, I can still see the man behind the monster. What does that make me? Sick? Co-dependent? Brainwashed?
I force myself to walk up to him and settle on the edge of the couch, even though my whole being screams at me to run in the other direction. He makes room for me and grimaces as he moves.
“Are you in pain?”