Page 22 of Reptile Dysfunction
“I don’t think she means any malice. Charlotte wants to prove herself, she’s just going about it wrong. I think we can chalk this up to a misunderstanding,” I explain my reasoning.
“Thank you!” Carolyn says in a way that implies they’ve been debating this all day. She looks at Dylan with a tired expression and shrugs her shoulders. “Have you ever had your heart broken by some asshole? No, you haven’t. You don’t understand. Just give her a slap on the wrist and a warning, and tell her to pull it together!”
“Not a real slap,” I say. I can never be too sure when a turn of phrase will be taken too literally in this town. “In fact, maybe just the warning will be sufficient.”
Dylan shakes his head and grimaces harder than his normal expression. “I think you’re making a mistake, Mr. Mayor, if I can be honest.”
“I’d expect nothing less from you, Sergeant.” In fact, I don’t think I could stop his brutal honesty if I tried. Sergeant Adams obeys the letter of the law, period, in all instances. It makes him great at his job, but it’s difficult to explain the shades of gray that sometimes require a bit more leniency.
“She broke into government property and stole files.”
“Pieces of paper,” I reply dismissively.
“She’s a reporter, that’s her job!” Carolyn retorts, crossing her arms in defiance. “The press is supposed to keep folks like you and me honest. She took papers she could have just requested, and by law, she would have gotten them! Because the press is supposed to have access to records of public knowledge. It’s not like it was confidential information.”
“Then she can do so within the bounds of the law!” Dylan grunts between his teeth. “Sir, letting her go is going to send a bad impression to the rest of the town. Like we’re soft on crime or something.”
“Arresting her will look bad! And what crime? It’s not like anyone got hurt. She’s just a human woman going through normal human woman problems.”
And Carolyn, better than any of us here, would know, seeing as she’s one herself.
“I think Mayor Wendall is right, and we should respect his judgment.” Carolyn looks at me with a smile. She must feel pretty pleased to win a debate with Dylan. Almost no one can get through that thick skull of his.
“Is it normal for human women to break into locked government property? Carolyn, listen to yourself. Mayor, I insist you reconsider.”
“I maintain my stance, Sergeant.” I fold my hands on my desk and nod at a fist-pumping Carolyn. “I don’t want to press charges. Now, if she escalates her law-breaking, or someone gets hurt, that’s a different story. But as it stands, I think a little time and understanding can sort this out.”
“Thank you, Mayor,” Carolyn says. She stands from her chair and takes my hands in hers, shaking them wildly. “I’ll make sure she gets it.”
“She should be getting time,” Dylan growls. “But if that’s what you want, fine.” He also stands, shakes my hand a little too firmly, and opens the door. As they leave, I can see Deborah looking back at me, an armful of files in her left arm.
Her expression tells me she did indeed listen in, and she’s not too happy about the results.
“Sorry, Deborah!” I say, shrugging my shoulders. “Lunch?”
13
CHARLOTTE
The blood-red, off-white, and slime-blue confetti rains down as the crowd celebrates yet another term of Mayor Mason Wendall, who won by a landslide as predicted.
The choir of harpies sings the Curiosity town anthem, while several dragons conduct an aerial display, flying in formation while performing a spectacular choreographed fire show.
Around me, monsters of all ilks are cheering and holding up signs with the gorgon’s smiling face on them. Werewolves howl, centaurs stamp their hooves, fae folk flutter their wings, and goblins raise their staffs in celebration. But all I can do is scowl.
“Thank you so much, Curiosity!” comes the mayor’s voice over the PA system, only causing more chaotic celebration. I almost leave there and then, but I want to stick around at least to hear the mayor’s speech. I’m still not done with my investigations, even if they have landed me in hot water as of late.
Mayor Wendall addresses the crowd with a massive politician’s grin. The kind that, to the untrained eye, looks gracious. It’s a handsome expression that should make me, and most women, swoon – if I wasn’t smart enough to realize it’s really the look of a delighted schemer.
Even though the last month has given me nothing but dead ends when it comes to Mayor Wendall, I know he’s hiding something. He just happens to be skilled at hiding it better than most.
But that’s exactly what gives him away. His perfect track record and unblemished reputation may as well be a smoking gun. No politician is this clean, and it only convinces me further that he’s a professional in the world of corruption.
It’s obvious what’s going on. Mayor Mason Wendall is so crooked that he’s managed to come off as the straightest arrow out there.
“It’s such an honor to have been chosen by you, my community, to serve for another term as your mayor,” he says to an ecstatic crowd. “Over the last four years, I’ve put my all into making Curiosity the best it can be. Every day, I fall more and more in love with this town. It’s truly a special place, and from what I’ve seen in the last four years, I know this is the greatest town in America! None of that would have been possible without the support of you, the people who make Curiosity what it is!”
Another cheer goes up from the crowd, but I just roll my eyes. Words of flattery might have fooled the rest of these chumps, but to me, it’s water off a duck’s back.