Page 50 of Ruthless Ends
“I’m not an attendant,” Cam says flatly.
She smiles and bats her eyelashes at him over her shoulder. “My mistake.” She situates herself on the bench and hefts the weights into her lap. “A spot then?”
I take slow sips of my water and watch in astonishment as Cam pushes off the wall and heads over to her. It’s apparent after the first rep of shoulder presses that she has no need for him, so he drops his arms to his sides and takes a step back. She grins as she finishes and sets the dumbbells at her feet.
My eyes flick from her to Cam’s face in the mirror, though Cam’s expression gives nothing away, as usual. I raise an eyebrow as I try to catch the number written on the side of those weights. Her warmup weight, apparently. They kind of look like the same ones Cam was using the other day. Maybe heavier.
Anya meets my eyes in the mirror with a smirk. “Dump the wolf. I’d be a way better trainer.”
I snort as Cam scowls and mutters, “I’ll leave you to it then.” He hesitates once he reaches the door. “Just…be careful, Valerie. Your progress has been good, but the strength won’t come back overnight. Especially if you overwork yourself.”
I nod, and he shoots one last look between me and Anya before opening the door and disappearing into the night.
CHAPTERFOURTEEN
On the rareoccasion I don’t spend the day restlessly tossing and turning, the dreams that await me make me wish I had. It’s a different one every time, but the feeling that lingers long after they’re gone is always the same.
Snakes and knives carving into skin, whips and wolf claws tearing through flesh, sobs muffled into pillows and bodies on metal tables, exhaustion as a cuff clangs against my ankle, the sun beating down on my face, wrists bound in rope, bones tearing through skin, staring into the eyes of my mother, my sister, my father, all looking back with cold indifference—
“Hey, you’re okay.”
I blink, forcing my vision to clear. Reid peers at me from where he kneels beside my bed, forehead wrinkled in concern.
My heavy breathing fills the silence as my surroundings come into focus—bed. I’m in bed. My T-shirt is plastered to my chest with sweat.
What time is it? A sliver of light is glowing around the outline of the curtains. Still daytime then. “What are you doing here?”
His frown deepens. “You were screaming.”
I press the heels of my hands into my eye sockets like I can physically force the images out of my head. “Sorry,” I mumble, not looking up. “I’m fine.”
That couldn’t be further from the truth, and I know he can feel it through the bond and see it in my trembling fingers, but instead of his presence bringing comfort the way it always has before, now it twists the knife deeper.
Because he’s here, but he’s not. Not really.
The weight of the covers lifts off me, and I snap my head up as Reid inches closer, like he’s planning to climb in.
“Reid…”
“Move over,” he says, his voice soft but inviting no debate.
I don’t know why I oblige. Maybe because even with as much as him being here amplifies the pain in my chest, I know that watching him leave will be twice as bad. I scoot to the far side of the bed, leaving more than enough room for him.
An audible sigh escapes my lips as his body finds mine, my face buried in his chest, his hand in my hair, holding me there, the same way he’s done several times in situations nearly identical to this one.
Only with one glaring, insurmountable difference.
Something shoves the thought into the back of my mind, letting it get swallowed by the dark until I forget about it completely.
“Just for today,” he whispers. “Can we let it rest, just for today?”
Pretend everything is okay, he means.
Another shove, and it’s forgotten.
He’s so warm against me, and my body shivers, urging me closer, to intertwine my legs with his, to slide my hands beneath the back of his shirt, searching for skin-to-skin contact.
Just for today.