Page 11 of Planet Wolf
Hunter stopped his jog—he didn’t even seem bothered by running and carrying me all day—and set me down. Leader banged into my side gently, and I grinned at him.
It was funny, actually. Our family hadn’t kept any pets growing up. Not a cat, not a dog, not even a goldfish. Too many people lived in our house, even though it spanned a city block, and my grandmother—who then, and even after death, remained the grand dame of the family—refused to consider them.
Her grandchildren underfoot day in and day out,yes. Animals,absolutely not.
I didn’t even know how Wolves behaved versus dogs—another question I’d like to ask.
They shifted back and grabbed the bag from Hunter very quickly. Maybe they’d cued into my nudity sensitivity, because they jumped into their pants a lot quicker than a few days ago. I stared at the mountain in the distance, giving them what privacy I could. It didn’t seem closer. I completely underestimated the distance the first day, when we started this trek. Maybe I’d been concussed or just out of my mind from being nearly exploded, but it really hadn’t occurred to me how far away we had to go.
So, a very long trip, and somehow, I had to do it without burdening these people who, despite bringing me this far, could abandon me at any time. I steeled my back.
I hoped I could figure out a way to communicate what I needed them to understand. “If all of you want to be Wolves…” I began, and then I got down on all fours and tried to walk like them, to indicate their transformation. Leader found it really funny. He actually threw his head back in laughter at my example, and I tried not to glare at him, since this wasn’t easy. I pulled myself back to my feet. I still had a point to make, despite his amusement.
“You could scratch the trees,” I demonstrated. “And then I could try to follow you so you don’t have to carry me.” I pointed at Hunter’s back. “Or wait for me.” I tapped my feet like I was waiting.
All three of them shook their headnoat the same time. My face fell before I could hide my expression.
“I don’t know how to mime out the idea that I don’t want to be too much for you. I don’t want you to not like me or regret that you saved me and brought me with you when this is over.”
They obviously didn’t understand me, but they must have somehow picked up on my vibe because Doc put his arm around me and drew me to him. He kissed my temple and kept his mouth there a long second. It was a comforting gesture. Like he didn’t know why I was upset, but he was sorry that I felt that way.
“Does anyone have any water?” That I could manage to show, using one hand like it was a glass and pretending to drink.
Hunter shook his head but then shifted and ran, like he was going to get some. Did they still have the bucket from in the cave? Where had they gotten it in the first place? Was it in the bag? Because he didn’t have that with him. He must have realized, because he came back, grabbed the bucket out of the bag, still in his Wolf form, and ran off.
Doc made no move to let me go. Just staying there, me pressed against his side.
Leader walked over and took my hand. He placed it on his cheek and leaned into it. For a second, he closed his eyes and he just seemed to breathe. Standing there in the woods, around the snow dripping pine trees, Leader and Doc were perfectly content to just stand with me.
Right then, I didn’t feel sick. Or weak. It was such an unusual sensation that I really just had to acknowledge them when I was lucky enough to find one. Hunter came back with the bucket, this time walking on two feet. Leader handed him some pants.
One of these times, I was going to look down and see what their things looked like.Things.Am I five?I just never thought about male stuff. I went out of my way not to. And… none of this was helping.
“Are we going to walk until nightfall?” I was still trying to figure out how to navigate asking in pantomime when a sound stopped us in our tracks. I looked up just as Leader shoved me against a tree, essentially hiding both of us from view. In fact, he’d shoved his body in front of mine.
Hunter and Doctor were on opposite trees from us, all of us out of view from the planes above us. I stared up. They were Union signature shuttles. Shouldn’t they want to see them? That was their rescue flying by.
“What are you doing? We should be flagging them down.”
He held me tighter. After the planes were gone, he finally let me go.
I pointed toward the sky. “What in the heck was that about?”
Leader’s eyes were Wolf. He actually let out a growl.Well, he didn’t like that. Maybe because I’d yelled? I took two steps back from him. Yep. Things just changed direction from me. He was a Wolf and he’d growled. If he wanted to shift, he could kill me.
“Okay. I’m sorry I yelled. I won’t do it again.” I put my hands out in front of me. I hoped it would pacify him. “Sorry, okay? Sorry.”
He shook his head. He wouldn’t accept my apology, so I wasn’t sure what to do. He walked toward me, his eyes thankfully back to human, and grabbed onto my hands. Everything about how he held himself was stiff. He pulled me against him roughly.
And quickly started the rocking thing again. Why was he doing this? Confusion muddled my brain. He’d just been growling at me, hadn’t he? Was he growling at something else?
Had I misread him?
Finally, he let me go. He breathed hard, worry obvious on all his features. Doc walked over, rubbing my back once he reached me, and Hunter put a hand on Leader. I tried to focus on Doc’s touch and calming my heart. It raced in my chest, a butterfly bashing itself uselessly against my ribcage.
“Sshh,” Doctor said, sounding like every doctor anywhere. It was exactly what I’d have done at home to soothe someone upset. Maybe I had completely misunderstood what happened?
We had to address the tension, even though we couldn’t talk. I pointed at Leader then my throat. He’d growled. And then I put my hand over my heart. It was racing. Did he understand what I was saying?