Page 38 of Hunted
I shook my head. “Never mind.”
Valerian stood aside and allowed me to pass through into his bedroom. He didn’t shut the door, but he closed it over. The gesture was meant to put my mind at ease. He wasn’t trying to stop me from leaving, and he didn’t mind if our conversation was overheard. It certainly helped me feel more comfortable, knowing that whatever was about to happen in here wasn’t going to suddenly get out of hand.
“Thank you for agreeing to talk to me,” he said.
I turned around to look at him. “You’re welcome…” I said. “You don’t have to thank me, though.”
“I felt like I should. It’s been difficult getting a moment with you since… in a few days.”
My cheeks flushed with fresh warmth. “Right…” I shook my head. “That’s my fault.”
“Your fault?”
“I mean, okay, before I start talking, please tell me why you wanted to see me. I don’t want to make this about me.”
Valerian softly nodded. After a moment, he said, “I know you have been avoiding me.”
I wanted to speak, but I held my tongue at great personal expense.
“I also understand,” he continued. “I believe I offended you, maybe even angered you. It wasn’t my intent… I clearly have some biases I have to work through. It was unfair of me to bring them up and direct them at you.”
I swallowed. “What biases?”
Valerian looked off to the side, his gaze wandering. “You are nobility… a Princess, born into Royalty. Into riches. Into luxury.” He gave me his eyes again. “You complain about all the other Lords competing in the Royal Selection… you call them idiots, pampered, soft. In my view, all royals are pampered, soft, idiots.”
I couldn’t hold my tongue any longer. “Did you call me in here so you could insult me some more?”
He shook his head and took a step forward. “No,” he sighed. “I apologize. Look, we come from very different worlds. Life outside of castles and palaces is nothing like the life of a noble. The people in the cities have a hard time, we struggle, we fight over scraps sometimes—whether it’s food, or magic, or even beds. I have never liked nobles… but you… you’re not like those other nobles I have met.”
“I’m not?”
Valerian bobbed his head from side to side. “Well, I mean, you do talk about yourself a lot.”
“Right.”
“And you have a lot of confidence, maybe some of it misplaced.”
“Uh-huh… where is this going?”
“But you’re also as wild as the wind… you yearn to be free, above everything else. I was wrong to suggest you wanted to be free on your own terms, that you wanted tohave your cake and eat it, as humans say.”
“Who taught you that?”
“Pepper did. She likes to make sure I sit down and eat all of my meals. She said I was… too skinny.”
My eyes lowered. “Skinny.”
Valerian nodded. “She also likes to talk a lot. Perhaps that’s a trait you inherit from her.”
I shook my head. “I really don’t know when to shut up sometimes,” I said. “I’m working on it. There’s a bunch of things I’m working on, in fact.”
“You are?”
“Ever since I left the castle. Ever since… all of this happened.” I paused, catching myself turning the conversation around again. “I’m sorry you’ve had to live through such hardships.”
“I’m not asking for sympathy.”
“And you’re not getting it. I don’t know what life outside of the castle is like. Even now, I’m being protected, fed, clothed. I’ve never spent a day of my life having to fend for myself… you’ve done it your whole life. That’s probably why I admire you.”