Page 44 of The Hate Date

“JJ—Joar.“ She huffs out a breath. Shakes her head. “You’ve got to stop this madness. I did not arrange any such thing.”

I take out my phone and pull up the Raya dating app. “We did. See?”

“Huh?” She peers at my phone. Studies it. Looks up at me solemnly. “Goddammit. You tricked me. Again. Do I need to get a restraining order? I’m being serious. This isn’t okay.”

I cock my head, annoyed. “Clover, something about this profile called to you. You’re the one who reached out to me.” I point to the phone.

The Hate Date

Handsome, fit, 40-something, well-off confirmed bachelor seeks a cool, sexy woman to spend time with. Only one problem. I do not date.

In fact, I hate dating.

So why am I on a dating app, you ask?

For me, meeting people is easy. Trusting someone is hard. Finding both connection and attraction with someone you trust is impossible.

This is why the dating ritual is time-consuming. Disappointing. Stupid.

It’s why people get involved with the wrong partners.

I’m on this app to put it all out there and see if someone picks up what I’m selling.

Here is my proposition:

If you’re receiving access to my profile, then one thing is out of the way. I find you attractive, and you find me attractive.

How do we go about figuring out connection and the trust?

I propose we meet and do an activity I hate. You pick.

If we survive the night, we’ll have a connection and hopefully you’ll trust me too and we’ll do something you hate together.

Who knows, maybe we can learn to love the things we hate. Together.

Are you in?

For our “Hate Date,” here is a list of eight activities I hate for you to choose from:

Dancing

Fast Food

Commercial Flights

Reality TV

Shopping

Charity Galas

Amusement Parks

Elevators

Clover squeezes her eyes shut, like she needs to take a moment. “I didn’t have any way to know this was you. The profile photo wasn’t your picture. Besides, what kind of hypocrite goes on and on about connection and trust…and then lies about their identity?”

“For fuck’s sake.” I’m annoyed. “I set this profile up specifically for you to find and respond to. I posted Seth, my attorney’s picture, because I knew if you saw it was me you’d instantly scroll past.“ I point to him sitting at the bar. He waves. “I wanted you to reach out to me and I made sure you did.”