Page 38 of Monster's Past

I fumble with the buckle of his belt, but he breaks the kiss and reaches for my hands to stop me.

“I’m sure about this,” I tell him, meeting his gaze. “I want this. I want you. But if you don’t...”

“I do.”

“Then why are you stopping it every time I try to take things further?” I can’t help the hurt that comes through my voice.

“I don’t want you to feel as if I’m not respecting you.”

I close my eyes and try to restrain my frustration. “And how is it respecting me if you’re not listening when I’m saying what I want? I know that me being your mate is a big deal, and it should be. But I’m okay with that. If you’re not and need more time...”

A low growl cut me off.

I raise an eyebrow.

Cethin clears his throat. “Sorry.”

“What was that for?”

“The thought of waiting might have provoked a bit of a response,” he admits.

I grin. “Ah, so youdowant me.”

“That’s what I’ve been telling you, Anja,” he responds, a hint of desperation in his voice. “But there’s no going back from this.”

I reach out and put my hand on his chest. “I know.”

“But you don’t know much about it.”

I laugh. “You’re not the only one who knows how to use the library to research things,” I point out. “Though it wasn’t much help. The internet, on the other hand, wasfarmore informative. There were even articles about the different kinds of equipment that some guys have.” Even saying it is enough to pique my curiosity.

And something else.

“Well now I’m worried you’ll be disappointed,” he half-jokes.

I reach out and cup his face in my hands. “In you? Never.” Sensing that the moment is here, I pull him closer and press my lips against his.

He kisses me back with an unexpected tenderness, the conversation seeming to have soothed him of some of his worries.

He moves closer and I shuffle closer to the edge of the desk so I can finally get him out of his clothes.

This time, he doesn’t stop me as I push down his waistband, baring him to me.

He lets out a small groan as I start exploring with my fingers, brushing myself over him and feeling the ridges and swirls that aren’t unexpected, but are an intriguing addition, especially when I consider what they might feel like when they’re inside me.

He breaks the kiss and moves his attention to my neck, grazing his teeth against my skin. I let out a small moan, most of my thoughts fleeing save for the most important ones.

“Will birth control work?” I ask, my voice coming out husky.

He chuckles, the sound vibrating through me and only turning me on more. Though from the feel of him in my hand, I’m not the only one with that response.

“Yes.”

“And condoms?”

He nibbles at the lobe of my ear. “Special ones.”

I let out a disappointed groan. “I don’t have any of those.”