Page 8 of Calavera Society

But the silence becomes too much when my mind travels back to my mom and the shitstorm that is becoming my life.

I know that my mom has been through hell, but why is it suddenly falling on me? Don’t get me wrong, I’d love nothing more than to take the burden of pain off my mom, but that’s not what this sudden displacement is. I’m ordered to go live with my father, to leave my mom and everyone I care about because my father said so. Why is she just falling in line? It’s almost as if my dad has some dirt on her and now, he’s blackmailing her or some shit.

Maybe I’ve been watching too much TV.

I stand suddenly, surprising Mateo as I turn to leave without a word of goodbye.

“Do you normally proposition men and then just leave?”

I turn my gaze to him, my RBF in full mode as I reply, “Nah this was a first because I’ve never mistakenly propositioned a guy too pussy to bang.”

He makes a face, “Do you kiss your boyfriend with that foul mouth?”

I know he’s talking about Noah, and to be honest, I can tell he’s fishing for information;is he her boyfriend? Are they serious?

I know, that sounds completely egotistical of me, but this is the second time he’s called Noah my boyfriend as though he wants me to confirm or deny and he didn’t take what was being offered. I’m not saying I’m hot as fuck and every guy wants me, but we’re at a high school party, there’s no strings attached, no reason to not get our mutual rocks off. I got turned down, and that’s okay too, but I’m not going to sit around and plead for it.

I run the tip of my tongue across my top lip before replying.

“Yep, sure do, and if I’m naughty, he even lets me suck him off and lick him clean.”

I stand up, flicking the end of the blunt into the water before looking over my shoulder, “Well, it was unpleasurable meeting you. I hope you trip and fall into a pit of snakes.”

I give him a sweet smile before walking away, internally shivering when his deep voice halts my steps, “You couldn’t handle me, little girl. I’m like the dark, imposing and fraught with dangers.

“I’ve never been afraid of the dark…I thrive in it.” I turn and look at him, “If you change your mind, come find me.”

FOUR

* * *

‘SHOOTOUT’ IZZAMUZZIC

Becky is talkinga million miles a minute, asking me questions about college choices and where I’ll be choosing to go, as if I have a shit ton of options on the table. I don’t. In fact, the colleges I’ve applied to either rejected me or haven’t responded. That’s fine by me since they were picked by my mother. She wants me to go to a religious college, someplace where my abomination willfulness will be replaced by some sort of spiritual awakening. She’s so full of crap I’m surprised she’s even taken seriously in this life.

To her, and my weak spine father, boys liking boys or girls liking girls is the broadest road to hell, but what she doesn’t understand -or refuses to- is that my road to hell was her birth canal.

I’ve been in hell since the day I was born.

If there is a God, he’s not interested in me and certainly not interested in my parents. As far as I can tell, they’ve been hidden away, like a dirty secret, and kept out of any deity’s eyes. I mean, what creator would want to look at the royal fuckups that are my parents?

I try to step around Becky as I watch Val’s back disappear through the crowd, but she’s relentless in her efforts to garner my attention.

“Listen, Becky, we just graduated, okay? School is the furthest thing from my mind. Now, I got shit to do.”

I try to step around her, but she moves with me.

“Well, it’s always good to have a plan, I mean you never know what’s going to come up and change—”

Her voice trails off, becoming static noise in the background as Val’s sad voice replays in my head.

“I’m moving to Louisiana with my dad…”

Val has been my best friend, a true ride or die, and now she’s just leaving. Leaving like she’s got absolutely no choice. Legally, she doesn’t, but when have we ever been the type of people to live law abiding lives? With the money I’ve saved up selling weed, coke and pills, we can buy a car and leave town, just the two of us if Rico and Leroy don’t wanna go. We could get a job and find a cheap apartment somewhere and never have to look back.

But I know it’s a fool's dream. Val would never leave her mother behind unless she had no choice, not even for me.

I don’t blame her though. If I had a mom like hers, I’d be the same way. But I don’t and leaving this place has been in the plan for years. If I don’t get into one of the colleges I applied for, I’ll do as I have planned. Pack up and bug the fuck out.