Page 20 of Sinful Addiction
Wow, I sound really stuck up.
I’ve glided through life never wanting for anything.Unfortunately, to my parents, I’m a disgrace to the Montgomery name.I didn’t go to Harvard and leave with a law degree like they wanted, or NYU to study medicine.No, I went to Stanford and studied business and design.For what?I have no idea.I needed to get as far away as possible from my family’s incessant need to remind me that I’m a failure and from the secrets I hold.
Mom: It is important you join us.
The need to throw my phone across the room is strong.Mom’s messages are literally making my head spin.I could silence it, but the messages will still be there ready to taunt me at a different time.The only way to stop her is by making myself miserable.
Me: Fine.
Mom: The car will be there tomorrow at 6PM to collect you.Dress nice.
Me: I’ll find my own way.
And there it is again.Her distaste for my personal choices.It’s not enough that I have the best wardrobe imaginable; she expects me to wear what she deems appropriate like I’m ten years old again.Perhaps I could arrive in last season’s clothes just to aggravate her.
As I’m finishing the slushy contents of my frozen daiquiri, my phone pings with another message.
“I’ve already agreed.What more could you possibly want?”
Looking at the screen, I immediately drop the phone like it scorns me.
I don’t want to see what he’s said this time.I can’t.If I do, I’ll cave and let him back in.His messages have been pleas of forgiveness and second chances.Something I never expected from Antonio.He’s been saying all the right things, but too little too late.I need more.
From the moment we met, he turned my whole world upside down in the most delicious yet infuriating way.He knows my tells, can read me better than myself and that’s what gets me fired up; the way he takes control while worshiping my needs.
The only downfall to our situation are the demons I can no longer placate.He needs someone who will submit without question, and that’s not me.Don’t get me wrong, I love his dominance and how easily and comfortably I succumb to him, but I don’t know if I can push my boundaries like he needs.
By asking for his all, I misinterpreted his dark desires.That wasn’t the Antonio I was expecting.
That was a monster.
A demon put on this earth with one purpose.
Tarnish everything that’s pure.
But I’m already tainted.
I can’t go there with him.Not when darkness of a different kind hovers above me.
I mull over the time we have shared.At first, he played me by wrapping me around his little finger.I was nothing more than a pawn in Ava’s kidnapping.A toy to get a reaction from his, or rather, their victim.
I fell for his charm.His sex appeal was, still is, second to none.I have never experienced anyone like him before.I never thought I’d be attracted to an older man.
This is exactly why I can’t stay away.
I miss his penis.It’s so beautiful and large and he knows exactly how to use it.I sigh at the thought of him walking around naked in my condo.How his erection slaps his stomach when he walks toward me.He exudes cockiness in every way, and he knows it.I imagine his hard body glistening under the spray of water as he tilts his head under the shower head.
I rub my thighs together to ease the building friction, but it doesn’t work.There’s a wet patch on my panties and a tingle that I can’t ignore.
To hell with it.I pick up my phone to see what it is he sent me in hopes he said something infuriating and it burns out the sexual frustration building within.
I am so wrong.
It’s a black and white picture of him wearing one of his crisp white shirts with the top buttons undone, and his jacket.The smirk in his eyes is the only tell he isn’t finished with me.
The caption underneath reads.
Antonio: You are my sinful addiction.Nothing in my life has come close to satisfying my thirst.UNTIL YOU!