Page 22 of Sinful Addiction
Antonio reaches out and tentatively brushes my skin with his fingertips.My whole body shivers at the sudden sensation as goosebumps cover my skin.I can’t look into his eyes any longer.I fear that this will be a repeat of all our other times together, but I want it so badly to be different.My head is spinning, but I also don’t want it ending in mockery.
I close my eyes and wait for what comes next.I try to let my attachment go and just be in the moment.This timehas to bethe last time.
“Open those beautiful eyes, Lacey.See me.”
I’m helpless to his command.
What I see next pulls at my heartstrings.The depth of his eyes resembles a million broken fragments that mirror my own.It’s as if I’m looking into an everlasting well of pain.Something that frightens me because I never want to be in that dark place again.
“Lacey, get out of your head.This doesn’t have to be what you think it will be.Give us one more chance.”
Unfortunately, he’s wrong.Our ending will come sooner than he thinks.It always does.
I shut my brain off, no longer wanting my thoughts to betray me.He can’t discover I’m about to let him go otherwise he’ll tie me down faster than a rodeo cowboy calf roping.I’ve watched them hot as fuck cowboy movies.
I catch a glimpse of something unfamiliar in his expression.Was that fear?He masks it before I can decipher what it means and goes back to being the man-demon I’m familiar with.
For one last time, I allow Antonio to become the dominant man he was born to be.
Ten
Antonio
She’s standing before me in nothing but her natural skin.The setting sun casts light upon her bronzed complexion.
I stand before her, butt naked, watching as shadows cast over her eyes.I’d love to know what she’s thinking but fear that if I voice my concern, she will call this whole deal off.
For the first time since leaving Vegas, anxiety clouds my actions.
Lacey pulls out of her stupor the exact moment I let down my guard, and I quickly replace my barriers.
At this moment I know the one thing we both need is for me to become the monster she thought she needed, but I can’t.I can’t do that with her because she means more to me than my own life.
She deserves companionship as well as the kinky shit I know she loves.
For one night I’ll show her that I can be a normal man and put my dominance aside, forsaking my stone-cold persona.
The need to have her is overpowering my senses, not to mention my painfully throbbing cock needs special attention.I cannot hold back any longer.
She’s shocked that I haven’t given her any orders, however she opens for me when my lips brush against hers and my tongue seeks entry.My taste buds explode with all things Lacey.
This is the homeliest I have felt in my entire forty years.I’ve struggled my whole life to fit in.I’ve never felt like I belonged anywhere until Xander took me under his wing, but this is different.The very first night we met we bonded through our connection.Two lost souls looking for their place to belong.She was clueless then, but not me.I knew she wasn’t like the others; it just took me a while to understand us.
Lacey craves the love and attention that she never received from her family.She looks to me for the things I wish I could give her because we’re the same; she doesn’t understand it yet, but I’ll prove to her that I’m worthy of protecting her heart.
I never had parents who cared for me, period.The one person who showed me love slipped between my fingers at a young age, and no one since has shown me what the meaning of love is.From that moment until I met Lacey, I believed it was all a lie.
I’m pulled from thought as I focus on the one person in this room that matters.But I’m too late.She jerks back like I scorned her.Her bravado has altered, and I can sense her emotionally withdrawing.
I hold her heated cheeks between my palms, exploring her ocean eyes.They’re now glossed over and sad looking—almost as lifeless as mine have always been up until I met her.
A lone tear escapes the inner corner of her eye, weaving its way along my thumb until it pools on the webbed skin.On instinct I lift my hand toward my mouth and lick the salty droplet.As soon as I do, I know I made a grave mistake by losing physical contact.She takes a step away from me, which causes my other arm to drop by my side, and I watch as she scrambles to put her clothes back on.
I’m too stunned to do anything about the scene playing out in front of me that I miraculously miss my belt connecting with my face as she throws my own clothes at me, then scurries out of her room.
What the hell just happened?
One moment she was screaming my name, the next she’s reserved, and I’m too shellshocked to act on it.This isn’t the first time a woman has rejected me, but this time seems different.It leaves a sickening burn in my stomach and an unwelcome tightness in my chest.This isn’t the time to become demanding, but I will not let her back out of this so easily.