Page 20 of Blurry Little Lines
My steps move forward, but hold reluctance in case he changes his mind. His arm opens, inviting me to lie next to him when I’m a couple of feet away. Why am I so hesitant when cuddling up or falling asleep on him is almost second nature. Maybe because tonight I question his feelings and can’t blame anything that comes out of my mouth on the alcohol. Am I overthinking?
Lying back next to him, I welcome the heat of his body and resting my head on his shoulder. Max’s arm bends upward, holding my head in place to look up at him. He blinks down at me, then looks straight up at the sky. A handful of the brightest stars burn above us over the city lights.
“In two minutes, I’m going in the hot tub.” I shiver and turn to my side, needing his warmth against my stomach. “How are you warm?”
“I’m an expert at controlling my body.” I glance up at him, trying to see if there is a hint of implication in his eyes, but it’s hard to tell in this light. “Just breathe. You’ve got this, Kels.”
I close my eyes and slowly inhale. Max’s alluring scent consumes me, and I realize this was a bad idea. So, why am I taking in another breath and melting into him? Max remains unaffected and continues with his even breaths. I feel warmth flood through my body, yet I know my skin is painted with goosebumps. I lift my leg over his waist to expose more skin to the cool air. My hand rests on his chest as his hooded eyes peer down at me. The arm behind his head moves to pull my leg a little higher and he leaves his hand resting on my calf.
“See?” He breaks the silence. “You’re no longer shivering.” But my heart is beating faster than someone who just ran a marathon. By the placement of my head on his shoulder, I feel his is too.
My fingers dance absentmindedly on his chest as the heel of my hand stays in place. The cool wind blows, and I shiver again. I shift my leg across Max as my robe wiggles open and exposes the curve of my hip. His arm drops from holding my head close as his fingertips lazily trace the curve of my figure up and down. My stomach flutters, free falling off a cliff when his other hand gently travels up my leg to rest on the back of my thigh. When I don’t stop him, his thumb moves back and forth just under my bum. His eyes glance into the distance down our bodies, and my hormones kick into overdrive.
As my head tilts up to look at him, his head tilts down, feeling my movement. Everything has been wordless, slow and discrete. Though I have never told him how I’m feeling, I know he can sense it. The look in his eyes tells me he is biting his tongue.
“What are we doing?” I angle my head up and mumble with my lips so close to his chin. If I purse them, I’ll feel the prickle of his stubble.
“Right now, we are two friends lying together to keep warm.” He doesn’t move any closer, but his hand leaves my hip as the crease of his elbow bends to hold my head locked in place.
“Max?” I whisper, feeling my pulse pick up as his other hand feathers down my spine.
“Hmm?” His voice is low, almost a moan.
“We’re just friends, right?” I’ve never made the first move in my life, and he hasn’t acted to pursue the first on me.
“You tell me.” My breath hitches as his fingers twist the string of my bikini bottoms and lightly graze my skin.
“Our friendship is one of the most important things to me.” I glance at his lips but hold myself back as my cheeks begin to heat. “Even if I may have developed a slight attraction to you.” There, I said it.
“Likewise.” He smirks, flexing his hips up. I feel the hard tip of his erection hit the back of my thigh.
I’m not dreaming in confusion to wonder if this feeling goes both ways. “Max?” My hand on his chest slides up to his jaw, and I watch his throat constrict as he forces a rough swallow. He is completely leaving this in my hands.
He doesn’t respond and continues to watch me with lustful eyes and pained restraint. He knows I’m on edge with my divorce and everything. Every step of the way, he’s been by my side, never asking for anything in return and without complaint. God, he’s a good guy. A good guy who deserves to be rewarded. Pushing my vulnerability aside, I know I’m reading our situation correctly.
My hand travels to the back of his neck as I lean in and connect our lips. A perfect rhythm instantly flows through our kiss, as if his lips were made to dance with mine. He moans into my mouth as his hand travels up my rib cage and down my side with a tight squeeze on my hip. The kiss remains slow, but nothing short of hungry. The sensitive skin on my forearm lights up as my arm slides against his skin to wrap entirely around his neck. My body hums with a dormant spark, desperate to be lit. I tug on his lips, pulling them in a soft, languid motion. Sucking his bottom lip, I take everything I need from it. His hands lift my hips, guiding me on top of him. Feeling his hard dick grind between my legs shocks my system as I inhale sharply. My stomach flips as my clit throbs with need.
A new, empowering side possesses my body as I bring my hand up to grip his chin to hold his head in place. I kiss him deeper as my other arm cups the back of his neck, pulling him to sit up. I feel my lip tug into a smirk at how he is following my lead. Circling my hips the way Lauren complimented me on the other night, I earn a low growl I’ve never heard Max make. His hands cup my ass, pulling me closer. We’re panting. In a frenzy to feel each other and closer than ever, my hands weave through his silky hair as my chest molds against his. My core hits the right spot on his dick and my hips move faster in need of more friction.
A whimpered moan leaves my mouth and echoes into his. Max hisses and tightens his grip to halt my hips. He continues our kiss, but I am no longer feeling the pleasure build with the lack of movement.
So, this is what kissing Max is like.A voice in my head gloats, and I freeze. I’m making out and dry humping my best friend. Or, was humping. Was my movement not enjoyable for him? Max senses my pause and slowly pulls back. Instead of acknowledging the panic across my face, he remains cool and in control. His smile is soft, but his eyes hold disbelief.
“Jesus, Kels,” he breathes, lying back down, putting one arm behind his head again. “You’ve mastered how to give one hell of a kiss.” His thumb and index finger tug across his bottom lips to wipe it dry. “That was…I’ve never–” He scans my face, attempting to search for words, and I feel pride course through me.
“I’ve always kissed like that.” I laugh lightly, enjoying that I left him speechless. “But it’s never felt as exhilarating as it did just then.”
“Exhilarating is a damn good word.” He sits up and brings his lips to mine again, but only for a soft peck. “I almost busted my load just from you grinding on me.” He shakes in head in disbelief. “That humiliation hasn’t happened since my early teen years.” I shrug, unsure of how to respond, and let his lips meet mine again in an addictive fluid motion. A moan lingers across our kiss, as his hands travel down my back and his fingertips dig into my bum cheeks.
My body needs more. I feel a release building, yet it still hasn’t delivered to take me over the edge like Lauren talks about. Slowly, I rock my hips against his dick again, but my heart clenches, knowing I can’t lose my best friend if things go wrong between us. I break the kiss and rest both hands on his shoulders to stabilize me as I stand up. Worry transposes across his face, so I quickly shake my head.
“I liked that,” I admit with a half-hearted smile. “I can’t lose you as a friend, though.”
He nods, looking up at me. “You will never lose me. I won’t hurt you, Kelsie.”
“I want to believe that, I really do. At least we got the kiss out of our system.” I shouldn’t feel my heart drop with disappointment for stopping us, but I do. “I have been wondering for a while what kissing you would feel like.” I close my robe along with my heightening emotions.
“I’ve wondered too, if I’m being honest,” he replies, still dumbfounded. “But now that you entered my system, I don’t know how I can sustain myself with just that kiss.”