Page 63 of Alluring Darkness
I slam my fist into his stomach.
Air explodes from his lungs as he doubles over from the unexpected hit. I ram my elbow into the back of his neck, making him crumple to the floor with a dull thud.
I sweep my gaze over the other people around me, and I know that there must be absolute fury and insanity swirling in my eyes, because two of them even flinch.
“Anyone else?” I growl.
They all snap their gazes back to the field. But no one is even looking in Raina’s direction now.
Rational thoughts slowly start trickling back into my mind. Didn’t I just tell myself that I was going to stop letting Raina drive me crazy? And yet here I am, beating someone up just because he called her a loser.
Raking a hand through my hair, I blow out an inaudible sigh as I slide my gaze back to where Raina is completely ignoring the yells and threats from her instructor as she instead marchesaroundthe wall.
I shake my head.
What the hell is this girl doing to me?
25
RAINA
To say that there is tension inside our family dining room is the understatement of the decade. The very air is practically crackling with it, and the clinking of our utensils against the plates is so loud in the thick silence that it’s nearly deafening.
At last, Mom’s restraint snaps and she slams down her knife and fork on the table. “I still don’t understandwhy!”
There is confusion, disappointment, and quite a lot of accusation in my mother’s eyes as she locks them on me.
Yesterday, she finally found out that I had quit the chemistry teacher program and instead enrolled in Blackwater University. She called me and Connor immediately and demanded that we come home the next day for a family meeting. I have already spent the past hour explaining to her that yes, this was my decision, and no, I’m not changing my mind. Connor has been suspiciously silent throughout the entire dinner, but I’m pretty sure that he has already told Mom exactly how terribly I’m failing all of my classes because she has brought that up several times.
“Because I wanted to,” I reply, cutting off a piece of chicken and popping it in my mouth.
“Stop with the flippant attitude, Raina,” Mom says, angrily flicking back her long blond hair. “And explain why you threw away your future as a teacher to do this… this… whatever this is.”
“I didn’t throw away my future. If this doesn’t work out, I can still re-enroll for the teacher program next year.”
“I can already tell you that it won’t work out. You know it. I know it. Your brother knows it. So why would you enroll at a university that you have no business being at?”
A flash of annoyance shoots up my spine, and I grip my fork harder. Since I don’t trust myself to reply politely just yet, I take an extra couple of seconds before speaking as I look back at Mom.
The lines around her pale green eyes are more visible when she’s angry. And sheisangry, there is no mistake about that. But so am I. In fact, it is taking all of my willpower not to slam my fist down on the table just to hear the satisfying rattle that would fill the air when all the fine plates and dishes would jump up from the tabletop. Or to snatch up one of those crystal glasses and hurl it at the wall and watch as the red wine splashes against it and then runs down like blood, staining the stylish white wallpaper.
Drawing in a long breath through my nose, I at last grind out, “I have every right to enroll at Blackwater. I am Harvey Smith’s child too, am I not?” I stab my knife in Connor’s direction. “Just like he is.”
Across the table, Connor is staring at a pile of broccoli with enough singular focus to make it seem like it’s the most fascinating thing he has ever seen. Cutting piece after piece, he eats furiously while looking like he would rather be anywhere but here.
“Of course you are,” Mom replies, her voice softening. Her eyebrows smoothen into a sympathetic look as she meets my gaze again. “But we’ve talked about this, Raina. You’re not cut out for that line of work. Your father, God rest his soul, agreed with that too.”
“Yeah, you and Dad agreed. But what about whatIwant?”
“You’re making our family look bad!” she snaps, the words ricocheting through the elegant dining room like a bullet.
And there it is. The thing she has been wanting to say from the moment I walked across the threshold. My poor performance reflects badly on the family, and that will ruin our chances of recovering from this financial and social mess. Or so she thinks. If she only knew what I’m really doing.
I glance towards Connor. He is shoveling rice into his mouth as if his life depends on it. And he doesn’t contradict Mom, which means that he agrees with her assessment.
Setting down my fork on the polished wooden table, I turn back to face Mom fully again. The silver candleholders on the table have been lit, and they cast flickering golden light over Mom’s gorgeous face. I look so much like her. Apart from the black hair I got from Dad, I look almost like a carbon copy of her. But even while noting all of that, I’ve never felt less like a part of this family than I do right now.
For a second, I consider telling them what I’m really doing. That I enrolled for the sole purpose of drawing Eli’s attention away from Connor so that he could finish out his senior year without any interference and then restore our family’s reputation. But my rational mind shuts down the idea immediately. If Connor were to find out, he would put a stop to my plan without hesitation in order to protect me. And the plan isworking. Eli hasn’t messed with Connor since the day I keyed his car. So I do what I’ve been doing for weeks now. I lie and deflect.