Page 44 of Crosshairs
“That was before I put it on silent. I always update Harry Grissom. It’s the bosses from One Police Plaza that I tend to ignore. There’s always a lot of information thrown at us right after we get the call of a body being found. It never really changes.” I waited, hoping Trilling might say something to put me at ease. I was out of luck.
After a few minutes of silence, I said, “Can we talk frankly? I don’t really have time right now to beat around the bush.”
Trilling smiled and said, “I’ve never been around you when youdidhave time to beat around the bush.”
“Do you want to say anything to me? Do you have any more details you can provide about why you never answered my call?”
It took longer than usual for Trilling to answer. When he looked up at me, I noticed his eyes were bloodshot. He suddenly looked older as well. Then Trilling said, “I don’t know what to tell you.” He shook his head and kept looking down at his plate.
“Tell me what’s going on. Why you look like you’ve been running from aliens all night. I just want to understand.”
Trilling slowly nodded. “I get it. And I can see why you’re looking at me funny after what I said about Gus Querva. The truth is, I’ve had a few issues since coming back from Afghanistan. The worst issue is sleep disturbance. My counselor at the VA got me a prescription for a drug that really puts me out. I mean, I lose eight to ten hours of consciousness. They call it ‘sleep.’ I call it a coma. Then I wake up feeling weak, tired, and confused. So I can’t honestly tell you exactly what I did last night. I started the night lying in my bed, and I woke up in my bed. I’ve learned from past experience that doesn’t mean I didn’t do something in between. Once I made a meal when I was asleep. The next morning, I thought someone had broken in and microwaved the Stouffer’s lasagna and garlic bread that was sitting on my kitchen table.”
“Have you told the NYPD medical staff about this?”
“They know I’m under treatment by the VA. They’ve been in touch with my counselor. I stay on my schedule for appointments and even have been to a couple of their weeklong retreats. My counselor, Darcy, is the one who came with me to visit my mother. We were on our way back from Albany in September. I let my mom think it was more than just a counseling retreat. That way she didn’t keep asking me if I’d met any nice girls in the city.”
I appreciated his honesty as I considered everything he had said. But it didn’t ease my concerns. I still had that funny feeling in the pit of my stomach. The one that always made me nervous. The feeling that everything was about to be turned upside down.
CHAPTER 53
WE CLEARED UP all the immediate interviews and leads related to the murder of Gus Querva. Rob Trilling looked so rough, I told him to go home. As soon as I said it, I knew ordering an insomniac to rest and sleep was like telling a heroin addict,Just stop using heroin. But Trilling didn’t complain. He said he was going to do his best.
I called Mary Catherine. She sounded tired.
I said, “Is the fertility treatment getting to you?”
“I don’t know, Michael. I thought I was past it.”
“Is there anything I can do for you?”
“No, darling, I’m just a little tired. And you’ve been working since the middle of the night. Is everything okay with you?”
There was so much I could’ve gone into. Instead, I said, “Just finishing up the last few things for the day. You sit tight and I’ll grab dinner on my way home.”
Forty minutes later, I barely made it through the door as I juggled four large pizzas in one hand and a dozen roses in the other. The grateful look on Mary Catherine’s face made the effort well worthwhile.
Despite a deep-down exhaustion, I enjoyed hearing about the kids’ day. It sounded relatively uneventful. Fiona appeared to have finally figured out algebra, Trent used parts from four different computers to make a working one at Holy Name’s computer lab, and Brian helped install a giant AC unit on top of a warehouse in the Bronx.
Chrissy was very sweet, making Mary Catherine sit at the table while she rushed around and brought her pizza, then a drink, then moved the roses closer to her on the table.
I noticed Jane huddled with my grandfather at the end of the table. They were looking at a sheet of paper and whispering back and forth like middle schoolers who had just been passed a note.
I waited until after dinner to casually slide next to my grandfather on the couch. He had just gotten his good-night kisses from the younger girls and was patiently watching the boys play a video game. I took the quiet moment to do some subtle investigative work.
“What were you and Jane discussing at the dinner table?”
“I’m not allowed to catch up with my great-granddaughter during dinner?”
“That’s not what I said. And I’m too tired to play your crazy word games tonight. Jane’s been acting a little secretive and I want to make sure everything’s okay. So do you care to tell me what you were talking about?”
“You know that I love you, my boy. This whole family is what keeps me feeling young. That’s why I’m sorry to disappoint youwhen I cite priest, great-granddaughter confidentiality. I’m afraid it’s one of those immutable laws of nature that wasn’t designed to be broken by an old sinner like me.”
“Do you ever peddle this crap down at the church?”
“Every day. Why do you think the monsignor always looks so confused?”
I had to laugh at that and appreciate how my grandfather kept the kids’ secrets. Everyone needed someone they could talk to without fear. Maybe that was where I was letting Rob Trilling down. Maybe he wasn’t comfortable being completely honest with me. I shook that thought out of my head.