Page 42 of Stand and Defend

I’ve never been on this side before. Well, this sucks—though I don’t know why, it’s not like I want anything with her. Relationships are complicated, but losing the option of having something more than our friendship leaves me feeling a little empty.

This is stupid.

Shaking my head, I attempt to focus on what’s happening on the screen. I’m sucked into the plot until I feel her gaze on me. When I glance over, she quickly looks away.I knewit.

I smirk but don’t say anything. Over the next twenty minutes, we exchange brief glances twice more. What is happening between us? I have to clench my jaw to keep from laughing. It feels like middle-school shit. Toying with her is so fun.

She seems immune to my charm. Maybe that’s where this magnetism comes from. If I fucked her, would this tension dissipate into thin air? One wonders. I’ve never developed a crush. Sure, there’s been women I’ve wanted to sleep with, but that’s all physical attraction, it’s biological.

With Jordan, it seems like more, but I can’t place it. Not that I’d make a move when she’s vulnerable, but there are times I forget about the shit with Bryan and she’s simply a girl in my space. She’s hot, and I enjoy spending time with her. If she wanted to rebound, I’d be happy to assist. I’m curious what it would be like to have a situationship with someone like her. She’s so down-to-earth and intuitive. She’s easy to be around. And I like the way her brain works—which is the strangest compliment I’ve ever given to someone of the opposite sex.

The male actor shoves the woman against the wall, and they start making out.

“Oh, he’s doing the wall lean thing. Ugh, that’s so hot,” she mutters.

I raise my eyebrows, entertained by how captivated she is by on-screen romance. For someone who suddenly hates marriage, she sure enjoys romantic gestures. The background music is right where it needs to be, hot and heavy. The characters move it to the bedroom. This pound-town soundtrack only makes me want to fuck her more. The heated friction between us isn’t helping. We get a view of the woman’s naked back as she rides him, and she throws her head back—naturally, her hair is the same color as Jordan’s. I’m beingpunished by the universe.

The scene seems to go on and on. I scrub a hand down my face. Once the sex wraps up, we’re back to car chases and vehicles exploding into giant fiery plumes. I adjust myself and refuse to look at her for the rest of the movie. First thing I will do after this ends, is take a shower and drain my balls.Again.

Finally, the main character saves the day and gets the girl—lucky fucker. The credits roll and she stands up, folding the blanket and tossing it back into the basket of throws and pillows.

She clears her throat, looking like she’s about to say something. “Um, so I wanted to apologize earlier. I know I tend to change the subject when we start talking about everything, I’m not dismissing you, I really appreciate your honesty and giving me the reminder.”

“Anytime.”

“And thanks for letting me crash here. It won’t be much longer. I’ve been looking at apartments, and a couple look promising. I’ve emailed to set up tours. This isn’t the most convenient arrangement for you, but I’m really grateful you’re letting me invade your space.”

She’s already found a place?That was fast.

I stand and stretch. “It's fine. Please, take up space, Jordan... Are you going to bed?”

“Yeah.”

I walk toward the doorway with her. Our hands brush, and she peers up at me. Her gaze drops to my lips, and I’m done for. Electricity rides up my spine, and I react without thinking. I pull her into me, my lips crash into hers, and she grips my shirt with both hands. Her scent permeates the air. I love it. Clean and crisp.

She gasps, and I take advantage of her open mouth totaste her. I’d do anything to hear a gasp like that again. I swipe my tongue across hers. She tastes like toothpaste andher.My hand slides in her hair, then she moves her mouth in tandem with mine. This woman can kiss. Hard nipples brush against my chest, and I walk her backward into the doorframe. Her lips are perfectly matched with mine. She smells like heaven, and tastes just as good. It’s not enough. I want her legs around my waist and my cock buried deep.

After two steps, she pushes against my chest, and it’s like a rain cloud opens up and douses the embers smoldering between us. Our kiss goes up in smoke.

“Sorry... I don’t know what happened,” she stammers.

The kiss of my life happened.

Realizing she’s still holding onto my shirt, Jordan shoves off me like I scalded her. She runs a hand through her hair, straightening it where it was ruffled from my palm.

She covers her mouth and looks around like she’s about to bolt.

I drop my arms to my sides. “Jordan?—”

Her face is screwed up like she’s disappointed in herself. The way she closes up so quickly is disheartening. For a moment, she let go and gave herself what she wanted. She kissed me back with as much tenacity as I had. She was into it. Getting to experience this other side of her felt monumental.

“I didn’t mean to. I had wine earlier and?—”

“So, you can’t kiss me unless you’re drunk?” I cut in.

“No, I mean... it’s not—I can’t do that!”

“Jordan, it’s okay. I kissed you first. It’s on me.”