Page 43 of The CEO
He couldn’t believe what she’d just told him. Sure, he’d caught the odd gleam in her eyes that indicated she was thawing toward him in the attraction stakes—not to mention her genuine responses to his kisses—but to say she was emotionally involved?
Hell. It blew him away.
It was exactly what he wanted, what he’d hoped for, to lead into a full blown long distance relationship, whatever that may entail.
The kicker was, she’d given him the perfect opportunity to say he was emotionally involved too, but he’d held back. For no matter how long he stewed over this, hashing out scenarios, it all came back to Uncle Jimmy and the fact he couldn’t let him down, couldn’t let the man who’d given him everything die alone.
Which meant he’d be on the other side of the world for a year, a whole three hundred and sixty five days, and he’d be damned if he expected Laa to wait for him for that length of time. She deserved more.
Besides, he’d traveled down this road before, with Magda waiting at home for him, and it had ended his marriage. She’d irrevocably changed while he’d been away, and there’d been no going back.
But Lana wasn’t Magda and he owed it to her, and himself, to let her make the decision.
Rubbing a hand across the back of his neck, he sank into the nearest chair, leaned back, and focused on the control panel in front of him.
He had to give her the option, had to know he’d tried his damnedest to make it work with the quick-witted, infuriatingly shy, naturally beautiful woman. She was worth it, every unaffected inch of her.
He just hoped she cared enough to take a risk.
ChapterTen
Feeling like a pawn in a romantic game of her own making, the last thing Lana wanted to do several mornings later was play chess, but she had a game scheduled with Mavis and she hated to let her down.
She sat on a comfy armchair and ordered a double espresso from a waiter, hoping the after-affects from yet another sleepless night didn’t show. She’d had to use concealer to hide the dark rings under her eyes for the first time ever. Beth would be proud she even knew what the stuff was for.
Lana spotted Mavis enter the games room, the older woman wearing a cute nautical outfit—white pants, navy striped T-shirt with a neck tie, and jaunty red cap—and she waved.
When Mavis reached their table, she grinned. “Guess what arrived at my door this morning?”
“Let me guess.” Lana screwed her eyes tight, pretending to think. “One of those dance hosts you’re so fond of?”
Mavis roared with laughter. “Bad girl. Next best thing though; an invitation to the captain’s cocktail party tonight. I’m sure there’ll be a few eligible men there to bat my eyelashes at.”
“You’re supposed to be setting me a good example.”
“Ha.” Mavis snorted. “I think it’s too late for you, my girl. You don’t need any lessons if that happy glow is any indication. I take it your tour went well the other day?”
The tour seemed like a lifetime ago considering what had happened since. She’d mentally replayed the chat she’d had with Zac the night the ship left Suva over and over, driving her crazy. Luckily, Zac had been tied up with work since and she’d barely seen him. Maybe telling him she’d become emotionally involved was a good thing? Perhaps it had driven him away once and for all?
Indecision tore at her. She wanted to tell Mavis everything to get the older woman’s perspective, but was still trying to understand the gist of it herself, so she gave her a brief version of events instead.
Mavis nodded in all the right spots, waiting until Lana finished. “Have you fallen in love?”
Lana sighed, resigned to the truth. “He’s a sailor married to his job. What hope have I got?”
“Have you told him how you feel?”
“Sort of.”
She’d told him she had feelings—of a kind. Invested emotion meant the same thing, right?
But they hadn’t resolved anything that night. After she’d dropped her little ‘emotion’ bombshell, they’d talked around it, he’d made a charming comment, she’d fired back a quick retort, and he’d walked her back to her cabin. Besides, nothing would happen unless she had the guts to show him how she felt, he’d made that pretty darn clear.
“What does sort of mean?” Mavis touched a pawn and moved it forward by keeping her finger on it, frowning in concentration before moving it back. “Some newfangled term you young people have for chickening out?”
Lana chuckled. “Yeah, something like that.”
Mavis glanced up from the chess board and fixed her with a stern glare. “So what are you going to do, Missy? You need to show him how you feel. Take a risk. See what happens.”