Page 50 of The Devil
“Evan, I’m pregnant,” I blurt out, “they think I’m about four months, but will need tests to confirm. We heard the heartbeat today, so whether I like it or not, I will be having a baby.”
Believe me, I’ve thought about the alternative and having a termination. However, whenever I do think about it, I can’t help but consider the little life growing inside of me, being dependent on me, and who has a little heart beating. Besides, my family would never forgive me if I did; Nonna would turn in her grave. It’s a hard choice for any woman, a personal one, and I guess this is mine.
At first, Evan’s eyes bulge and his mouth gapes open like a fish. Seeing his shocked expression forces me to gulp back more water in the hopes I can prevent bile from churning in my stomach. Evan looks at my father, my mother, and then back at me. I instinctively shrug my shoulders like a clueless child, no longer knowing what to say.
That’s when Evan reacts in a way I would never have expected. He breaks into a smile, small at first, but is soon grinning from ear to ear. Before I can respond in any way, he grabs hold of my shoulders and hugs me fiercely. I swallow my mouth full of water and look at my parents with a thoroughly gobsmacked expression. Their initial reaction is a look of equal shock, but then they begin to smile at each other as though they’re reassuring one another that the knight in shining armor is cool about knocking up their daughter.
“I’m going to be a daddy?” Evan cries with a sickeningly sweet smile on his face. “I mean, everything is ok, isn’t it? How are you feeling? We’ll have to get married! Don’t worry, baby, I’ll get you any ring you like. Oh, God, sorry, Mr Carter, may I have your daughter’s hand in marriage?” Evan’s diatribe of rambled thoughts has my parents chuckling at one another, all beaming smiles, while I seem to be the only one frozen in utter shock over this man’s unexpected and weird reaction.
“Y-you’re happy about this?” I ask him, looking at him as though he’s taken leave of his senses.
“Baby, I’m over the moon!” He hugs me again and I can’t breathe. “I mean, yes, it’s a little early in our relationship and I would have liked us to have been married and all, but hell, yes!”
“Well, that settles it then!” my father declares with a beaming smile. “Looks like it’s all turned out for the best.”
“Wait! What?” I stand and stare at them all with an irrational rage building inside of me. “What do you mean ‘thatsettlesit’? I haven’t even answered or said how I feel or anything.”
“Helena, honey,” Dad tries to reason, “you’re expecting a child with the man, and he wants to marry you. What is there to decide? You love each other, right?”
“Of course, we do; right, baby?” Evan rushes out with his teeth gleaming inside of his smile.
“Your mother and I can help you out with your own place and Evan can adjust his course so he can work more and study in the evenings to complete his degree.”
“Dad! For Christ’s sake, shut the hell up for five seconds!” I shout, probably louder than they’ve ever heard me speak before. Silence engulfs the room as they all look at me with horrified expressions. “You don’t understand, any of you!”
“What do you mean, darling?” Evan says in that frustratingly sweet, concerned voice of his.
“There is another potential candidate for the father position,” I finally utter, shutting my eyes firmly so I don’t have to look at any of their disappointed and judgmental faces. My mother gasps and when I finally open my eyes to face Evan, he looks away with pain written all over his features.
“Who?” My father pushes out angrily. “You better tell us, young lady, you owe Evan that much.”
“I was in Spain four months ago. Evan and I weren’t exclusive and although he did come and see me for a week, there was also someone else, a one-night stand if you like. I’m not proud, but I won’t apologize for it either, so stop trying to make me out to be the fallen woman. We weren’t exclusive; Evan was seeing other people too.”
Evan looks up at me without expression but doesn’t deny any of what I just said.
“Do you even know his name?” Mom asks more softly.
“Yes,” I reply in a low, broken voice. “It was…I was with…it was Lucius Hastings.”
“What?! Paul’s boy?” My father shouts furiously and with his face turning dangerously red. “Why on earth would you sleep with someone like that?! The boy’s a monster, an asshole who I wouldn’t trust with a sandwich, let alone my only daughter. Do you remember what he did to your brother’s girlfriend at that wedding? Jesus, I thought you had some sense, Helena, I thought I had brought you up properly!”
He begins frantically pacing up and down until Evan suddenly rises to his feet. For a moment, I think he’s going to slap me, but instead, he takes hold of my hands with gentle affection.
“Helena, I still love you very much. I can’t pretend it doesn’t hurt to know that you might be carrying another man’s child, but you’re right. We weren’t exclusive and I did do my fair share of sleeping around with other women. So, I will be there for you during the pregnancy. When the baby is born, we can have him or her tested, and if… If it is mine, I will marry you and we can put all of this behind us.”
“You’re a decent man, Evan,” my father says arrogantly, “there’s not a lot of men who would do the same in your position.”
I roll my eyes over the hypocrisy of it all, but keep my lips closed. I don’t trust myself to be civilized if I bite back now.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need a little bit of time to process all this,” Evan says, dropping my hands and walking toward the living room door. “I’ll call you later, Helena, look after yourself.”
He nods to my parents and marches to the front door where I hear it open and close with a heavy thud.
“Poor guy,” my father sighs. “He’s a good one, Helena, let’s hope it’s his.”
“And I’m bad? Is that it?” I snap.
“I can’t believe you would be so stupid!” he shouts at me. “Lucius fucking Hastings! You have always been the sensible one! The reliable one!”