Page 30 of Worship Me
“I don’t know. Sometimes? No one there even knows what kind of shifter I am, except for my family. The peacocks were slaughtered because the Eyes of God. I was told that they refused to be controlled. Their power was heavily coveted, but they wouldn’t yield. Since they couldn’t be used as a weapon, they were killed. My family kept my secret, but I can’t trust that anyone else will when push comes to shove. So I don’t get close to anyone. Most of the time I’m good with it, I suppose, but it can get lonely.”
My honest admission shocked me. I hadn’t ever said that out loud before.
He hummed in response, placing the palm of his hand onto my deltoid. Warmth pressed into my skin, sending tingles over my body. “I know how that feels, actually. More than you can imagine.”
When he lifted his hand, the gashes were now faint scars. I touched it, looking up at him. “How’d you do that?”
“It’s a power bestowed to only those that are called ‘Entitled Ones.’”
I twisted my lips. “Fair enough. It’s my turn to ask questions.” I held my hand out, but he just stared at me confused. “The cloth, please. I know your wounds are healed, but the least I can do is help you clean up. You’re covered in blood too.” My eyes drifted to his tanned skin, looking down at his arms and seeing the remnants of our earlier battles.
He dipped his chin, turning around.
“Tell me about your world before this madness took over. Before your bitch of destruction started leveling temples,” I suggested, choosing to make a statement rather than ask a question. I thought it might help him open up.
His muscles tensed, but I remained quiet, gently cleaning the dirt and blood from his back.
Finally, he sighed. “It was a happier place. There’s not much more to it, really. When she is here, the world falls into darkness after a time. There’s nothing I can do about it, I’ve learned, and my people suffer for it. No matter what I do, it seems.”
“Where is she now?”
“Gone.” It was his only answer, and the sadness in that singular word danced across my skin.
“Gone?” I pressed. “Like, she’s visiting her family in Fiji, or she’s dead? Do goddesses even die?”Please tell me this one did.
He chuckled slightly, but it was halfhearted, the movement creating tiny ripples in the spring. “This one can die, yes, but she always comes back.”
I traced the cloth down the length of his arm, taking care to make sure the skin was free of impurities. My hand followed in its wake, rinsing off as I went. “How can she come back from the dead? That seems awfully convenient. Is she a necromancer?”
“No, she has a temple that keeps her reincarnating. While I am the god-king of this world, she was created to be my equal counterpart. To balance me should I ever . . . lose control. Except it ended up being the opposite. Somewhere along the way, the fates that created us both made a mistake. While I cannot die, she can, but whenever an act of injustice occurs that triggers her magic, she’s reborn. Her temple has made it so that she’s stronger with each lifecycle.”
“A temple? That’s it?” I repeated, raising my voice a bit. “Well, if she’s always destroying people, why don’t you return the favor? Destroy her temple and kill her for good?”
Pan turned as I finished washing his back, and when I moved to wash his chest, he held my hand in place, keeping his eyes focused on me. “I can’t destroy it. No one can,” he whispered. “It’s tied to her in a way that magic can’t break. She’s the only one who can destroy it, and she never will.”
I could see how much pain he was in, and it tore me apart inside. Reaching up, I placed my hand on his cheek, staring into his swirling green eyes. I couldn’t help the strong desire to use my power.I wanted to see into him. I wanted to know more, but as I released a piece of my magic, his eyelids narrowed a fraction.
“I can feel you trying,” he said, cupping my hand. “I won’t let you in.”
I frowned. “You’re keeping something from me. I just want to understand. I want to help.”
“And what would you do to help, if you could?”
“I don’t know, maybe light her on fire?” I suggested. “We have really good pyrotechnics on Earth. I know a warlock, he’s a fuc—err, a friend who experiments with magically enhanced dynamite. I’m just saying, it’s worth a shot.”
“Why do you care so much?” He asked, searching my gaze. “I’ve been an ass to you most of this trip. The people here have done nothing but try to kill you. Why do you care what happens to us, them, if the goddess of destruction returned?”
“I don’t like bullies. My sister Danni was bullied horribly when we were kids, all because she couldn’t shift. I took the punches that I could, but if I got in the way they just hurt her twice as bad when I wasn’t there. I felt helpless. So, I can relate to the way this hurts you. I want you to be free of that, even if you are an ass. I can’t fix this curse myself, but you’ll get your animal souls back when you return me. I’m sorry my . . . kind have been such dicks, but I want your people to be free of their cursed bodies and able to shift as one. I want this world to recover. If what you say is true and this goddess of destruction will come back, they’re going to need you at your best even more.”
“You almost give me hope,” he said so quietly I nearly missed his words.
“Almost?” I asked, trying to cool the flames that were slowly eating at me.
“I’ve been around too long to wonder how it ends.”
I nodded slowly. “Maybe you’re too old and set in your ways, but I’m not. This time you have the portal to Earth. Maybe those same fates that screwed you decided to throw you a bone?” My lips curled up in a half smile as he stared at me with something I didn’t want to name.
“You continue to fascinate me, Adora,” he whispered, caressing my hand. “You are so much more than I expected.”