Page 73 of Sizzle
“Miss Murphy, thank you for coming in today.” A mid-forties male detective smiles at me, then turns to Liam. “Liam, I’d say it’s good to see you, but I guess not under these circumstances.”
“Jim.” Liam stands to shake his hand, and I remain in my wheelchair.
Just then, I watch as the father of my child’s back goes ramrod straight, and I follow the direction in which his vision is tunneling. And then there is Dan Quillin, being led from a room at the back of the station.
“What the fuck is he doing here?” Liam barks.
Jim blanches and gives the other police officer, the one leading Dan, a death stare. “I told you to wait until tonight to move him. They’re here for the statement. I’m sorry, Miss Murphy, this wasn’t supposed to be?—”
“You’re okay?” Dan Quillin directs his question to me, his eyes searching my face, and my walls come up.
But even through my defenses, I can see his ghost-white face. The way he’s shaking, not with fear, but I can tell it’s remorse. The way he seems to visibly let go of a breath he’s been holding when he sees that I’m all right, as if no one told him yet whether I survived.
“Don’t you dare speak to her.” Liam’s harsh command makes the man who almost ruined us nearly crumple.
“I’m so sorry, I never meant for any of this?—”
“You almost killed my wife!” Liam roars, and I fear he’s about to tackle this man across the police station.
“I didn’t know she was there.” Dan’s voice is a desperate, reedy thing. “I swear I didn’t know. I would never hurt another person, a woman. I’d never … I’m so sorry, Liam.”
The older man breaks down crying, and I can’t hold on to my hatred. The disgust and anger for this faceless person, someone I’ve never met but knew by name only in the last two weeks from conversations with the Ashton … he’s not a monster. He looks much like Liam’s father, a man who has worked all his life to preserve something.
Now that it’s slipping through his hands, he did something drastic. You never know what you might be capable of until you’re faced with a dire situation. In my heart, for myself and this man who is losing everything he worked for, I decide to forgive.
I don’t know what divine intervention got me here so quickly, but it’s like his expression, the way he sounds so desperate to take it all back, just helped me let go of any lingering anger. I know what it is to harbor upset, frustration, and malice. It’s not healthy for anyone, and it solves nothing. Dan will get his punishment, but I can rest easier knowing I don’t have to be a part of it.
The old me, the one who was scared of so many things, would be proud of how I’m handling this now.
“Liam.” My fingertips are on his arm, and my voice is meant to be an antidote to the tension in the lobby.
My soon-to-be husband turns to me, bends down to where I am in the wheelchair, and shuts his eyes. “I need to control myself.”
I palm his face. “You’re keeping us safe, I’ll never be mad about that. But look at him. Really look at him.”
He turns away from me to do as I ask, and for a few beats, I know he’s really studying Dan. When he turns back to me, his lips are pursed, but the fury has left his expression.
“That’s a man who is remorseful, who deeply regrets his actions.”
“Baby, he hurt you.”
“And I’m okay. So is our son.”
Liam stands, surprising me, and points a finger in Dan’s direction.
“You have one chance to answer me. Tell me why you did this.”
Dan’s eyes drop to the floor, shame evident in his figure. “You know that our farm has been struggling for a while. We were in dire straits, financed to the hilt and trying to secure more. Then the government came and said they were seizing our land, land that’s been in my family for generations. Not only would we barely be able to pay off our debts with the money they were giving us in exchange for taking our property, but we wouldn’t be able to survive with what they were leaving us. Then our cows developed some kind of bacteria that made it impossible to sell these last few months’ worth of milk, and it all just collapsed. I couldn’t take it any longer. Everything was unraveling right in front of my eyes and there was nothing I could do to control it. But I could … fucking hell. I wasn’t in the right state of mind. It’s not an excuse, but part of me thought, if I destroyed something that seemed to be working so well, I’d feel better about my own shit luck. Why was my farm disappearing while yours was thriving? I’m not proud of those thoughts. But to act on them? I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what to do, my family’s legacy is gone. I’m a selfish man to try to take yours, too. You have to believe me, I never wanted to hurt a person, any of your family. I didn’t see you,” he directs this to me now, “and when I did, I tried to stop right away. The machine was going too fast, though.”
He’s right. I watched him try to stop it. I’ll have to recount that part in the statement I give to Detective Jim.
“I’d take everything back. I was crazed, furious, out of my mind with anger and shame. I never should have targeted you, and I’m … I’m so deeply sorry to both of you. To your family, Liam.”
Dan’s eyes stay on the floor, and I watch more tears drip to his feet.
Liam’s hand lands on my shoulder, and even though I wish we could erase what’s happened, my heart still hurts for this man. I know what it’s like to feel like you’re unanchored, running from the inevitable.
What happens next is something I never expected in my entire life.