Page 67 of Wrapped in Hope

Chapter 24

Watchingher walk away with her parents feels like the end. I know she says she’ll be back, but I’m sure they will make her see how wrong this all is, the same thing I’ve tried telling her since before everything started between us, the same damn thing I’ve been fighting with myself over.

When she closes the door, I turn my stare to Jane who looks completely happy with taking away the last shred of happiness I have.

“I hope you’re happy,” I say as I turn my back to her to climb on the bike.

“I’m not happy that I had to do that, but you have to know how wrong all of this is. I mean, what were you thinking? You think you can cheat on me with Dean’s girlfriend who’s half your age and everyone would be okay with it? You’re disgusting.” Her lip snarls with repulsion.

I turn and march back up to her. “Cheat on you? Is that what you’re calling it now? Because it wasn’t that long ago that you told me that we haven’t been a married couple for a long time. In fact, you were completely fine knowing that I was seeing someone. It wasn’t until you found out that it was her you suddenly had a problem with it.”

“She’s Dean’s girlfriend!” she yells causing spit to cover my face.

I run my hand over my face to wipe her spit away. The action only pissing me off more. “Dean is dead! He’s gone! Accept it!”

Tears fill her eyes as she looks at me like I’m the monster. “If you loved him, you’d never be able to betray him like this.” Before I know what’s happening, she’s slapping me, beating her fists against my chest, and pushing me backward.

I have no choice but to wrap my arms around her and carry her inside. She’s fucking lucky I don’t hit women. That makes two people I’ve been attacked by today, and more than anything, I’m ready to fucking snap.

I carry her inside and drop her on her bed, pointing my finger at her. “Stay down! You need to calm your shit before you get sent back to that fucking mental hospital you just escaped from. We’re done, Jane. Fucking over, and you don’t get a say about my fucking life anymore. Got it?” I level my eyes on her. “Get your shit, and leave.”

I walk out of the house as fast as I can. I need away from here. I need time to think. I may have just lost the love of my life, and now I’m being attacked by the woman who’s made my life hell for the past five years.

I hop on my bike and take off as fast as it will go. I go straight home, wanting to wait for Hope, to see if she returns to me. I don’t know what I’ll do if she doesn’t. Am I strong enough to let her go? I almost didn’t make it the month we were apart. I had to fight myself every minute of every day to stay away from her. But if she asks me to, I know I will find the strength. I will do anything for her, even if it kills me to do so.

A fire starts in my heart and burns its way up my throat. It makes my throat feel like it’s closing up. The first thing I do is the thing I always try to avoid. I reach for the liquor. The burn of the alcohol is nothing compared to the fire raging on in my chest right now. But with every drink, that fear dies little by little.

* * *

I haveher in my arms again; her body melting to mine. Thinking I’d never get this again makes it all the sweeter. I was only away from her for an hour, and already I was going crazy without her. What if she came here to tell me it’s over?

My heart stops.

She wouldn’t be kissing me like this if it was over for her, would she?

What if this is a goodbye kiss?

I pull away from her and look into her eyes, wanting to keep this look right here with me always, regardless of how this plays out.

“How’d it go?”

I see her shoulders slump as she lets out a breath. “Can’t we just go back to what we were doing?”

I offer a small smile. “That well, huh?”

She laughs. “It couldn’t have been any worse.”

I wrap my arm around her shoulders and lead her to the kitchen. “I’ll make us a drink and you can tell me all about it.”

I pour us both a strong drink and we sit in front of the fireplace where she tells me everything that happened and what was said. She tells me about running into Jane on her way out. That only pisses me off after the confrontation we had earlier.

A part of me will always hold Jane close to my heart, but it’s out of habit. I spent the better part of my life with her. Not to mention she is the mother of our adoptive son. I can’t just forget all the memories I share with her, but I can’t put up with her daily battles either. I understand why she doesn’t like me and Hope together, but she lost the right to have any say over my life long ago.

“I’m so sorry, Hope.”

Her eyes flash to me beside her. They are soft and full of love. “Why are you sorry? You didn’t do anything but give me exactly what I need.”

I shake my head. It’s full of confusion and guilt that is just eating at me. “I never should have allowed this to go on. I’m ruining your life.”