Page 69 of Chase
He kisses my poorly head, then jumps up to get me some tablets. Meanwhile, I move with as much enthusiasm as I can muster, but it’s still a good half an hour before we’re on the road again.
_____
Izzy
Theo walks into Nonna’s room first, leaving me to hover by the door. I’m feeling a whole host of emotions, though guilt appears to be coming out on top. I was so angry with her yesterday and for the first time in my life, I’m awkward in front of her. When I see the frailty of her body, even more so than yesterday, my eyes fill up with tears. She looks so small, so thin, and so pale; I can see life slipping away from her.
“Get over here, young lady,” she says in her most authoritative voice, which is enough to make me run over and launch myself onto her bed. She pats my head as I let it all out, everything, the past and the present. My tears, snot, and sobs all spill out from me. She offers me her usual comfort, even though she’s the one leaving. I’ve been dealt a pretty bad hand over the years, but Nonna has always been the stable comfort and hope in my life; the thought of her not being here makes my heart break into what feels like a thousand pieces. When I finally look up at her, she has her very own set of red, puffy eyes and a matching pair of tear-stained cheeks.
“Theo, do you think I could talk to Izzy alone for a minute?”
Of course, he dutifully nods, kisses us both, then leaves.
“I’m sorry I was so angry,” I whimper, “but I just can’t understand why you have never said anything to me.”
“Oh, I think we’ve both been keeping some pretty important information from one another, don’t you?” She eyes me in such a way, I know Theo has told her everything. I wither under her gaze and feel all the shame of everything overcoming me once again. “My darling girl, why, oh, why did you not come to me?”
I shrug, not wanting to elaborate on my dealings with Ethan, nor the rest of my family for that matter. Saying it all out loud even just once was more than enough for me to handle.
“You were the only person who didn’t see me for the things they accused me of, Nonna,” I whimper, “and I was so afraid you would if you knew what they had done to my body. You wouldn’t see me as a little girl anymore; they made me grow up before I was ready!”
“Oh,” she cries, touching my cheek with cold fingers and a trembling lip. “You will always be my beautiful granddaughter, Izzy. And I love you as much as I ever did.”
“M-my mother…my biological mother, do you know if he knew her, or was she just some random woman?”
“Izzy,” she says, her hand reaching for mine, “I called your father yesterday, demanding to know who she was…is. He refused, but then he said something; he let something slip. He told me the matter had been closed, sorted, and even Wyatt had learned to forget about it, so why couldn’t I?”
“Wyatt?” I repeat, frowning over his name, an imposter to this conversation.
“Wyatt, Izzy,” she says, nodding as she does so. “Now, why would he have to come to terms with who your mother is?”
My eyes bulge over the answer to that question because there’s no other reason for his involvement. Nonna nods her head, knowing I’ve come to the correct conclusion.
“Well, as you can imagine, I was straight on the phone to my other son,” she says while the sensation of my blood pressure dropping at a dizzying speed hits me fast. “It was during that phone call that I lost myself…blacked out. Wyatt called the ambulance…he and…well, they arrived at lunchtime.”
“You’ve spoken to her?” Fresh tears are blurring my vision as I try to rein in my sadness and anger. She nods, still clutching hold of my hand.
“I know it may not feel like it, Izzy, but after speaking to her, I am convinced she loved you, and was genuinely heartbroken when she had to leave you with your father. I saw the pain of it written all over her face. She believed she had no other choice; please believe me, Izzy.”
All of a sudden, I’m angry with her, so angry with her words that offer the woman who left me in hell, her sympathy. But then I also see the woman who has always been on my side, no matter what, now small and dying in a clinical, colorless bed.
“What possible reason did she have for giving me up?” I just about manage to ask through angry tears, moving my hands away as I stand up and away from her, creating distance to see things objectively. However, Nonna reaches her hand out for mine on the side of her bed, and I look at it for a moment before sliding down next to her. We sit, crying together for precious moments, knowing these are some of her last.
It’s not long before warm hands wrap around my waist and a forehead leans against my hair. Theo’s face nuzzles into the crook of my neck as the emotion of Nonna’s ill health washes over him too. It’s always been Nonna and me against the world, and she’s been my rock through all of it, even if she didn’t know the worst of it at the time; she still helped to keep me alive. I cling to Theo a little bit longer, knowing that he is now my new rock, my new everything that Nonna won’t be able to be for much longer.
“I’m going to miss you both,” Nonna says with a smile, “but I’m glad you finally found each other again. Your mother did well.”
“I know,” Theo says.
“I was talking to Izzy,” she corrects him, to which he shoots his eyes up to meet hers, a furrowed brow taking over in his confusion. She then looks over to someone else. Someone who is standing behind us, so we both simultaneously turn around to face this new apparition.
Standing in the doorway, trying to look as small as she possibly can, is Frankie. She has a steady line of tears streaming down her cheeks and she looks almost terrified of the people who are now looking at her for answers.
Theo continues staring at his mother while I turn back to Nonna. All she does is nod her head in reassurance to me. My head feels fuzzy, dizzy, like I’m about to pass out, because how the hell can this actually be happening?
“W-what the hell is this?” Theo finally shouts as Frankie begins to step towards us. She throws her hands up in front of her defensively, before trying to rush over to him…or me, I’m not entirely sure which one of us she’s trying to calm down first. “Mom? Is this true?”
“Yes,” she says, sounding quiet and sheepish. She reaches her hand up to his hair and runs her fingers through it for a moment before stepping back and setting her eyes on me. “I’m sorry, Theo, but I really need to speak to Izzy.”