Page 129 of House of Lies
He stares at me in silence, his eyes unblinking, his jaw tense.
“Get on your knees, zhizn moya,” he says, his voice deadly serious.
If this were any other man, I would tell him to go fuck himself. But he’s not just any man. If Kaz needs this to know that I mean every word, then I’ll do it. I fall to my knees, never breaking eye contact. I think I detect a glimmer of something in his eyes, but I can’t quite discern what it is. It’s not hope or forgiveness. I can’t tell.
“Now crawl.”
I comply willingly. Placing my palms on the floor, I arch my back and crawl toward him. I’ll give him whatever he wants and whatever he needs. The moonlight streams through the window, casting a soft glow on Kaz’s face. I pause, my heart pounding in my chest. I hurt him. I shattered his heart, and now I’m here, confessing my love. A million conflicting emotions surge within me, but I can’t discern his feelings. He stands before me, cold and distant, waiting for me to beg forgiveness. My words didn’t convey how sorry I am, how much I love him, or how desperately I want to turn back time and stay. I should have stayed the first time. I attempt to speak again, but all that emerges is a soft, inaudible whisper.
“Turn around.”
I do as he asks. Kaz steps forward, his hand wrapping around my neck. The touch sends sparks through every nerve in my body. He straightens me, my head resting between his legs. He massages my neck, reminding me of my fragility in his arms. I want to take away all the pain, but I know I can’t. I want to make things right, but I’ve already caused too much damage. Is it too late?
“You broke me when you left, zhizn moya,” he says, his voice filled with pain and longing.
I tilt my head back, feeling the edge of his wedding band pressing into my skin. He never took it off. I look up at him as he cups my chin, his thumb tracing my lower lip.
“I’ll do anything,” I whimper.
He might hate me, but some part of him still wants me, and I can only hope he’s not strong enough to fight it. I feel his dick twitching as I graze the tip of my tongue over his thumb.
“What for, solnyshko?” I bring my thighs together, trying to focus. “Is it my forgiveness you want? My cock? My life? You think you can waltz in here and have whatever you want?”
I know him, despite the lies I tried to convince myself of. He wouldn’t touch me if he didn’t want me here. He would have asked me to leave by now. His men would have forcibly removed me. The fact that my belongings are still scattered around the bedroom fills me with hope.
“I want everything—all of you,” I confess.
“Do you, now?” He smirks. I nod, determined to have him. “And are you willing to do anything for that?” I nod again without hesitation.
If only he would tell me what he wants, I’d do it. I am prepared to atone for my sins, however he sees fit.
CHAPTER 85
Kaz
Fuck, she’s even more beautiful than I remember. It feels surreal to have Caelia back in my life. She could have chosen any place in the world, yet she decided to come back to me. I don’t know for how long I can keep this mask on. All I want is to hold her in my arms, kiss her, fuck her, and keep her by my side. I hope she knows what she’s doing. When she confessed her love for me, she sealed her fate. There’s no turning back now, and I have no intention of setting her free again. She belongs to me more than she ever did before. It feels like the greatest triumph of my life. However, I won’t make it easy for her. I want to see her uncertain for a little longer. I want her to suffer for everything she’s put me through.
“You should start by taking your clothes off.”
I expected her to fight me when I asked her to crawl to me, but it seems that she made peace with what she wants and needs. She’s willing to do anything for me now. This is the moment I’ve been expecting since I first saw her picture—when she would need me so badly that she’d do anything to have me.
“May I stand?” Her obedient voice turns me on even more.
“You may, solnyshko.”
I hadn’t planned on calling her zhizn moya again, but the words slipped out. I hate seeing her afraid and filled with doubt, but she deserves it. Eventually, I’ll admit that I never stopped thinking about her and that everything I told her the night before she left still stands, but not now. She stands and turns to face me before undressing slowly. She’s wearing a black skirt that ends just above her knees and a dark green silk shirt that I want to tear off her body. I clasp my hands together, observing her as she unbuttons the shirt. There’s a hunger inside me that only she can satisfy. I had seriously contemplated hunting her down and dragging her back to me, but this is far better than anything I could have imagined. Caelia is here of her own volition, begging for my forgiveness. The shirt is discarded, and she steps out of the skirt, standing before me in black lingerie. I wonder if she’s considered every detail that might drive me wild.
“Bend over at the edge of the bed.”
My patience wears thin, and every nerve in my body is aflame with anticipation. I don’t need to repeat myself. She does as I’ve asked, stretching her hands above her head. I can finally focus again for the first time since she left. I kneel behind her, curling my hand into a fist in her hair. I spank her ass cheeks repeatedly until her beautiful skin turns red, reveling in her moans. Instead of trying to escape, Caelia smiles at me. I know it hurts her, but she doesn’t complain.
“Lie on your back.”
She moves onto the bed obediently, like the good girl she is. I remove my shoes, gripping her by the neck and pressing her into the mattress as I position myself on my knees between her legs. Her eyes meet mine, begging me to forgive her and take whatever I need. She arches her back as my hand travels between her breasts, coming to rest on her stomach. I flatten my palm against her skin, sliding it up and down, deliberately avoiding the area she craves. Her skin is as soft and addictive as I remember. Parting her legs, I lift one onto my shoulder, caressing her calf, her thigh, up and down until she quivers.
“Is this what you want?”
“I need more, Kaz. Please, give me more.”