Page 78 of House of Lies
“I’m tired, Kazimir. Can we fight tomorrow?”
“No. We’ll fight now, and we’ll make up tomorrow.”
“You are truly insane. There were too many lies between us. I don’t know how to deal with it right now.”
“You don’t have to deal with any of it right now. I’m not going anywhere,” I stress out.
“Yes, you’ve made yourself clear. Why do you want to know what happened to me so badly?”
“I need to know what happened to you so I know who I have to kill.”
“I can’t tell if you’re serious or not.”
“I’m dead serious, Caelia. Every man who laid a hand on you will die if they’re not already dead.”
“You’re mad. I’m not telling you anything.”
“I’ll kill everyone on Mattia’s side, whether or not you tell me,” I assure her. “But it would be better if you did so that I could torture some more than others.”
She stays quiet for a long time. I know I can’t force the words out of her. She has to say them out loud; all I can do is be here for her, trying to contain my rage. But she won’t give me anything—not tonight, at least. I don’t know how to reach her, and I have never felt so helpless.
I’m in this mess because of my stupidity. I’m aware of that.
“I don’t understand you,” she sighs in frustration, her voice barely above a whisper.
“What don’t you understand?”
“Any of this!” She throws her hands up in the air. “You killed Ermanno. You have Mattia and should have been on the other side of the world by now.”
I feel my patience slipping again. She has a way of infuriating me like no one else, and I hate losing control. Caelia flinches when I approach the bed, but she has nowhere to run. She tilts her head back as I lean over her, my hand gripping her hair. She clenches her teeth, her eyes narrowing.
“I would choose my battles carefully if I were you, and this is not one you can win. Let me tell you this one last time, so listen closely.” I pull her hair back, causing her to wince. “You will come back with me. In what capacity? That’s entirely up to you. You don’t know me. You said it yourself. You only know me when I’m pretending to be your husband, but I’m done pretending. I can make your life a living hell worse than anything you’ve experienced before. You think you want to be dead now?” I smirk, leaning closer. I can feel her ragged breaths on my lips. “Wait until I’m done with you.” Something inside me breaks as tears glisten in her eyes, but I don’t falter. “Do you understand?” She nods. I let go of her hair and take a step back.
I’m following in Mattia’s footsteps but for different reasons. He wanted to break her. I want to heal her. Perhaps this is not the way, but I will never be the soft man she needs. I won’t treat her like glass. She lowers her eyes, sniffing her nose. I understand she can’t stand me touching her right now. I get that. But she refuses to speak to me, which drives me insane.
“Please tell your guy I’m sorry for how I reacted.”
“My guy?”
“The tall, blond, intimidating guy. It was stupid. He has nothing to do with this.”
“The tall, blond, intimidating guy is Vanya. Or Ivan. He’s my cousin. Don’t worry about that.”
“I don’t want him to hate me.”
Vanya has mixed feelings about Caelia. I’m sure he will warm up to her in time, but her reaction certainly didn’t help. He will probably think it’s because of the scar, a reminder from when he was kidnapped as a child.
“He won’t hate you. Don’t stare at his scar for too long, and you should be fine.”
“It wasn’t because of the scar.”
“I know that. But he’s fragile like a bomb.”
He once gouged someone’s eyes out for staring too long at his scar, but I don’t share that detail. It won’t help my case.
I will eventually break through to her, even if it means breaking her entirely first.
CHAPTER 52