Page 101 of The Lucky One

We were fourteen. He had gone swimming wasted, and when my screams went unheard I had to save him. With his limp body in my arms, I barely had the strength to keep myself afloat. On the dock, pumping his chest until he gurgled up water—

That night I couldn’t sleep, so I studied everything I had to know about first aid.

My throat ached to think about it. For a moment I wanted to run back up the stairs.

Two years later, we had one of our biggest fights here. “You’re doing it again, Kiki,” Jon had growled, giving me a pissed-off look that made my skin shiver.

“I just asked how many beers you had,” I said, trying my best not to break down in tears.

“You’re acting like I can’t control myself. I don’t want to date my fucking mother.”

He broke up with me that time. A few days later, I called him and promised I would stop worrying so much. But I did worry. I worried every day when I learned the signs of addiction. Night after night I immersed myself in the subject, reading way too much to be able to deal. How it didn’t only affect you temporarily, but could damage your organs in the long run. I studied him, not asking questions, treating him with such care that I neglected my own needs, slowly drowning myself instead.

When Jon walked in tonight, I noticed something in his features that I had hoped to never see again.

“Kiki?” Paul took my hand as hot tears streamed down my face. I quickly wiped them away. It had hit me out of nowhere. I was here with Paul; he would never put me through that passive-aggressive emotional torture.

“Sorry... this place,” I sniffled, but the tears kept flowing. Paul pulled me into his embrace.

“Fuck, I forgot this was where you found out about Jon and Emily.”

I yelped a cry-laugh. I had forgotten about that. This was a place of terror despite its natural beauty.

I pulled myself out of Paul’s arms and wiped my eyes. “You wanted to talk?”

“Actually, let’s head back upstairs. I don’t think this is the right place.”

I raised my brow. “I’ll be fine. What is it?”

Paul drew his fingers over his face, pulling his eyelids down. “Nah, let’s go back up. We can talk about us some other time.”

He went for the stairs but I grabbed his elbow. “About us?”

Slowly he turned to look at me, a soft expression on his face. “When you pushed me away the other day, I couldn’t blame you. You want to go to Princeton. I understand. And I still needed closure with Emily. Which I got.” He took a couple of steps toward the lake. “I kept telling myself that you were just a friend. But after what happened at Olive Garden—” He swallowed, and I crossed my arms. This was the moment—a moment that suddenly scared me more than it should. “I wasn’t sure if what’s between us is only friendship.”

I looked at the ground. I had promised myself never to come second again. Great, he was saying all this now... but he should’ve said it weeks ago.

“I respect you, Kiki. That’s why I backed off when you told me to. It’s true that a part of me still loves Emily, but that part shrinks the more time I spend with you. I want to spend more time with you. But I don’t want you to feel like you’re not wanted, so if you want me to stay away for good, I will.”

I let out a long breath. His honesty meant so much more to me than pretending he was over her entirely. He was speaking the truth, and I admired him for it.

High school wasn’t over yet. I could still have a happy love story. No matter what happened after, I could have the guy who healed me. I could learn how to trust again. I could learn a lot from Paul if I was willing to take one more risk.

I closed the distance between us and pressed my lips onto his.

He gasped, clearly not expecting my move, but didn’t immediately pull away. For a brief second I hesitated, but then he put his hands on my cheeks and deepened the kiss. Despite the taste of cheap beer, his flavor crept into my heart. His kiss was delightful, soft, exploratory but not imperious. My heart beat so fast I could feel my knees want to buckle.

“Wow...” he whispered when we broke our connection. “I guess I’m not an idiot and you do like me too.”

“Maybe a little bit.”

I beamed at him, and he smiled and shook his head. He brushed his thumb over my cheeks, wiping away the traces of my tears. “I didn’t want to have our first kiss while you’re crying.”

“Trust me, this memory will make up for everything else that’s happened to me here.”

We were each other’s bandages... But thinking about it now, it wasn’t anything bad. It was exactly what we both needed. No one was being used.

“I want to make this right,” he mumbled, breathing me in.