Page 95 of The Lucky One

I exchanged a smile with Kiki in passing. Despite the crazy awkwardness of our conversation, the idea of Paul being with her didn’t bug me anymore. Especially not after witnessing how her eyes sparkled when we talked about him. She clearly really liked him, and he deserved someone as smart and beautiful as Kiki.

When we settled in the car, I used my last percentage of battery to text Jon.

Me: I got it! Just a few more days of patience ;)

I still hadn’t received a response by the time the battery died. Gena dropped me off at home and went ahead to the pharmacy herself; she had an appointment at the hair salon right after.

“Zack!” I knocked at his bedroom door, desperate to borrow his charger. “You there?”

I opened the door—only to immediately close it again, squeezing my eyes shut. I couldn’t believe I saw him rubbing his...

I swallowed hard. He was fifteen, I should’ve thought about that before bursting in.

He opened the door a crack. His long hair fell in a tangled mess. “Fuck. After you knock, you’re supposed to wait!”

“Sorry! I wanted to ask if I can use your charger...”

He rolled his eyes. “Forgot it at Helen’s. Use Paul’s.” With that, he shut the door in my face, and I couldn’t blame him.

I knew Paul was at football practice, and I didn’t want to invade his privacy. But my desperation to see Jon’s response was killing me. I padded down the stairs, waiting several long seconds after my knock before cautiously entering his room.

It looked somewhat better—still not quite meeting my preferred level of tidiness, but at least his dirty clothes were in a hamper. There were no new posters, I rejoiced to see, which meant therapy was working.

My happiness vanished when I noticed my kitten mug sitting on the table with a tea bag in it. Paul didn’t like tea. I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply. He can date, it’s okay.

Anyway, it wasn’t right to snoop around. I walked straight to his nightstand, where I knew he kept his charger. My breath caught in my throat when I opened the drawer. Beside some condoms and gum was the notebook I had gifted him for Christmas. And next to it—a little blue satin box.

My hands shook as I took it out. It fit right in my palm. I opened it, and a little stone shone at me from a silver ring.

There was a note, too.

It started with Dear Babycakes, and ended with Will you marry me?

I stared down at it, my heart beating so loud I could hear it pulsate in my eardrums—and then it broke for the future we could’ve had. Paul was ready to do this for me. He had wanted this, no matter how young we were. The room began to spin, and my legs trembled. I squeezed my eyes closed and took deep breaths like Caroline had taught me.

One... Don’t think about the what-ifs.

Two... Everything is okay, this is just your brain panicking.

Three... You’re safe. Nothing dangerous is happening to you.

I opened my eyes, part of me hoping I would wake up from a dream. But this wasn’t a dream. It was a dream scenario in a reality where it didn’t belong anymore—a parallel universe where I was still with Paul. In this life, I had chosen not to be with him, and that was okay. I turned the ring over and over in my hands. I had to put everything back the way it was, plus leave the charger. If Paul knew I had seen this, it would make things even more complicated, and—

“Emily...?”

“Paul!” I twirled around, hastily hiding the box behind my back. “You’re home early!”

“Yeah, Coach cut practice short... What are you—” His eyes locked on the open drawer and he turned pale.

Too late. I brought the box in front of me again. “I had no idea,” I said. “It’s a beautiful ring...”

He ran his fingers through his hair. “Your mother helped me pick it out.”

“Mama?” I gasped, dropping the box. Quickly, I reached down for it and placed it back into the drawer.

“When I was at your place. I thought it would be a cute anecdote to say that I already got the ring when I went to Germany the first time. I hadn’t planned on proposing though, until—” Paul crossed his arms. “You weren’t supposed to see it.”

“I was looking for your charger,” I said quickly. “Mine’s broken, and normally I use Zack’s but when I went into his room he was—doing stuff, and then he said he forgot it at Helen’s and—” My throat burned for breath. The air wasn’t reaching my lungs. I sucked harder but only coughing came out. “Can’t—breathe.”