Page 51 of Ruined Wolf

“No, what?” I asked, running my hand through my hair and pushing it back from my face.

“You aren’t there for me, Nova. You lied to me, betrayed me. You don’t love me. I won’t fall for that again.”

I shook my head. I was too tired. Exhaustion spread through my limbs, making them feel like lead. “Isn’t that convenient?” I muttered.

“Convenient? What are you talking about?” he snapped.

“It must have been such a relief, Lucas, to find out that I was lying after all. That I’d deceived you. You were right all along, and now the danger’s passed, hasn’t it?” My tone was unmistakably sarcastic, and he frowned.

“What are you on about?”

“You. You’re off the hook. Safe from actually having to take a risk.”

“I don’t follow. You’re talking shit again.”

“You’re the one full of shit.” I glared up at him. “This lets you off, doesn’t it? You don’t have to face the situation where someone actually fell in love with you, where someone saw every side of you and still loved you, because that goes against every story you like to tell yourself—that you’re a monster and that no one could love you, because you aren’t worth it.”

He recoiled like he’d been shot, but I’d had enough of pulling punches, and he wasn’t getting off that lightly.

“It must have been terrifying when you finally realised I’d fallen for you. Did you know before I did? I bet you did. You see everything except yourself, but it’s fine. I lied after all, which must mean I lied about that too, and now you can slink back into your hole of self-pity and meaningless sex and not have to worry about messy emotions anymore. But the joke’s on you.”

“And why is that?” I could barely hear him, his voice a rough whisper under the noise of the wind, rain, and waves.

“Because I did love you, Lucas, shadows and all, and I still do. I probably always will. Well, until you hand me over to Caleb, and he orders his men to rip me apart.” I sighed and held out my hand.

He stared at it, like it was a dead fish or something. “What?”

“I’m five months pregnant, and I’m utterly exhausted. Won’t you at least help me up before you deliver me to my death?”

He hesitated, then shook his head.

I rolled my eyes and struggled to my feet by myself. My legs shook under my weight, and my foot turned on a loose rock, wrenching my ankle. “Ouch. Shit!”

Reacting fast, Lucas grabbed my arms to steady me, then froze. Even in the near darkness, I could see the expression of horror cross his face as he looked down where his hands were wrapped around my upper arms—my bare, cold, damp upper arms. Fuck.

“Lucas,” I said, pulling my arms out of his grip. “Lucas, look at me!”

He wouldn’t, continuing to stare at my arms, his expression almost vacant.

“Lucas!”

His chest rose and fell rapidly, and his breathing was shallow and fast. He was going into shock, and I needed to stop it. I reached up and grabbed his shoulders, trying to shake him out of it and make him look at me. He raised his eyes to mine, but there was no recognition there.

“Lucas, please. It’s Nova, you’re here with me. Come back to me, Lucas.”

He shook his head slowly and took a step backwards, then another, and another. I followed him, thinking if I got him out of the cave, he would be okay. I turned to him, trying to guide him through the narrow gap that led to the main cave. As I looked past him, I realised with horror that we’d nearly been trapped. The two boats were farther out, the waves were higher than before, and the water was almost at the mouth of the cave.

Lucas saw the water too, and his eyes went wide. He gasped and froze where he was.

“Keep going, Lucas. We can make it.”

He was too far gone, too far back in the past, and he backed away, turning to scramble through the cave, away from the rising water.

“Lucas!” I screamed, the sound of the surf almost deafening. “Lucas, stop! Wait.” I climbed back through after him, going as fast as I could. I stumbled and came down hard on one knee, feeling a flash of pain and a trickle of blood as the sharp rock tore through my sweatpants. “Shit! Lucas, where are you?”

I made my way carefully back to the main cave and nearly fell over something as I squeezed through the opening.

“Lucas!”