Page 55 of Ruined Wolf

“That was a hint,” he said, sounding amused. “I could have gone another round.”

“I thought you were mad at me,” I muttered, feeling around the rocky ground for my trousers.

He sighed. “I was, I am, and honestly, Nova, I have no idea how we’re going to get past all the secrets. I do know one thing though. I know I want to get past it. I want you in my life, Nova. I need you there, no matter what happened in the past.”

I shook my head. “I lied to you all. I could have given you the closure you needed, and I kept it all secret.”

“To protect yourself. We all have secrets, Nova. Dark creatures that move within us, and shadows hiding just beyond our eyes.” He took my hand, squeezing my fingers gently. “You’ve seen me stripped bare, Nova. You’ve seen the monster that lurks inside, and you didn’t run away. You stayed and you loved me anyway. I think with your sunshine shining into my soul, there might be hope for me—hope for a real life, a family, and love. We’ve had a rocky start, and I can’t speak for the others, but wherever we go from here, I want us to go together.”

“Lucas,” I whispered, tears forming in my eyes. “I don’t deserve you.”

“You deserve love, Nova, so much love. You’ve had to be strong and ruthless to survive. I know that. I’ve done it myself. Maybe I might need to accept that I deserve it too. Maybe together, we can be stronger... and softer.”

He pulled me back into his arms and held me, stroking my hair as I buried my face into his chest. For a few moments, we sat cuddled together, and I felt a glimmer of light, the tiniest spark of hope that maybe, just maybe, this could still work out. I sniffed and sat up, dashing cold tears from my face.

“We still need to get out of here,” I pointed out.

“We do. Anyone know you’re here?”

I shook my head, even though he couldn’t see it. “Nope. Obviously, I was trying to get here and then escape.”

“Good point. I’m fairly certain my phone won’t get signal under here,” he said. There was some rustling, and I realised he was looking for his phone in his pocket.

“I’ve got it,” I told him, reaching into my jacket pocket and feeling for his hand to slide it into his grip. “I found it after you passed out to see if I could call for help, but it’s smashed. I think from when you tripped. Oh, how’s your head?”

“I’m a bit fuzzy,” he admitted. “And I’ve got a cracker of a headache.”

Guilt filled me. “Oh, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have...”

Lucas laughed. “Jumped me?”

“I wouldn’t put it that way!” I retorted.

“Neither would I,” he murmured softly then sighed. “I’m assuming someone’s told you about how our father died.”

“Maverick did,” I admitted. “He said you really struggled with it for years and never really got over it.”

“He’s right. I was a stupid kid. Treasure hunting, of all things. I got stuck in here, and my father came looking for me. He found me, but when he was trying to get down to me, he fell and broke his neck.” He shuddered. “I can still hear the crunch as his body hit the ground and his torch smashed.”

“Lucas, I’m so sorry,” I murmured.

“Me too. We were stuck down here. It was so very dark, and the only image in my mind was that of my father, his head twisted and eyes staring off into space, looking at nothing. I screamed for help, but no one came for so long, and he just got colder and colder. I thought if I kept him warm, he would be okay, so I tried.”

I snuggled into his chest, ignoring the chill on my bare legs, hoping the rest of me was warm enough that he could feel it.

“You were just a kid. You couldn’t have known he was already dead and that nothing you tried would have worked. You can’t blame yourself, Lucas.”

“I knew he was dead. I saw his face before the dark came back, but something in me couldn’t give up on him, and he wouldn’t have given up on me, so I used my own body heat to keep him warm. I rubbed his arms and legs, and cuddled into his chest, but he just got colder and colder.”

“And now, you can’t stand the feeling of cold skin,” I murmured, putting it all together. I felt him nod.

“Skin in general, to be honest. It’s the memory of the warmth fading from it, until it got cold and clammy, and I got colder too. I thought I was going to die from it, and I wanted to go with him. That feeling didn’t go away for so long, Nova.” He sighed, turning me sideways. His hand rested on my thigh, and I felt him tense.

I grabbed his hand and pulled it away. “My legs are cold,” I told him, “but the rest of me is fine.”

He took a shuddery breath. “Yes, I know. I know.” He pulled his hand out of mine and placed it back on my leg, stroking up and down to warm me.

I could feel the tension in him, but he seemed to need this, so I let him carry on.