Page 65 of Chaos

His voice drops, and I simply nod my head and give him a small smile. I wouldn’t be able to hide the disappointment from my voice if I spoke.

As I look into his dark eyes, I know exactly what he’s doing. He can’t hide the pain on his face.

He’s running.

Even if he might not want to. That’s what he’s doing.

Hugging my chest, I take a step back to watch him.

His curls fall into disarray as he runs a hand through his hair, his lips flatten with a hint of sorrow.

“Go, then. I’ll leave the door unlocked for you.”

He shakes his head. “Lock it. I’ll use the key you gave me.”

“Okay.” I’m pretty sure I’ll find it in an envelope in my mailbox in a few days.

He steps forward, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead, and I fight the sob that threatens to erupt.

Why does this feel like the end?

I can’t look. His heavy footsteps vibrate on the floor beneath my feet. The second I hear the click of the latch, I fall against the wall, smothering my face with my hands.

Was this too soon?

Did I drop it on him the wrong way?

Have I ruined Maeve’s chance to have her dad?

My shaky hands wipe the tears flowing down my cheeks. I kind of thought he would be different. That maybe I would be enough for him.

Tipping my head back, I hit it against the sheetrock, taking deep breaths to bring down my blood pressure.

Maybe there’s a chance he’ll be back. Or that is just a stupid fantasy.

I’ve dreamt of this day since I gave birth to her. No one seems to bring me to life quite like Jax.

All I can do is wait for him to show me the man he is. I’ve survived on my own for long enough, except this time, he might just leave my heart broken.

THIRTY-FOUR

JAX

Slamming my front door shut behind me, I head straight to the refrigerator and grab a cold beer.

I almost turned around on my way here in a sudden panic that Sofia might think I’m just walking out on them both.

I’m not.

There’s no way I would do that to her. I couldn’t break her heart like that.

She didn’t do any of this to spite me. In fact, what she has done for me is nothing short of incredible.

And I need to show her that.

I need some space to gather myself. I’m on my own now. I don’t have Kai guiding me out of causing chaos in my life.

I didn’t trust myself back there, in the heat of the moment, not to ruin everything. So, I did what I do best, get on my bike. It’s the only way I know how to think.