Page 3 of Echoes of Eternity

Lifting her right shoulder a fraction, she locked her gaze on the blue skies above.

“Well, tell me what you’re thinking about?”

“Grandpa . . . I didn’t even get to say bye, Mom. He’s just . . . gone.”

A warm, gentle breeze brushed Emily’s cheek in that moment. It felt like a hello from the other side, even though she didn’t believe in that kind of thing. “Grandpa might be gone, but his memory still lives on in our hearts.”

Pulling her daughter by the hand, she brought her teenager into her lap. Maneuvering Elizabeth close to her chest, she could feel her heartbeat. Life became more precious in that moment as she comforted her daughter in her grief.

Across the yard, the metal gate creaked open. For a second, Emily forgot about Frank being gone and jerked her head suddenly, hoping to see him walk through the gate like she had so many times over the years. Reality quickly caught up. In her view came her husband, Ryan, and his brother, Jason.

Elizabeth and Emily stood as they approached the two of them. Her eyebrows lifted as her gaze connected with Ryan. Her voice gentle, she asked, “Decided to come back?”

“Yeah.”

Jason patted his shoulder and motioned his body toward the house. “I’m going to head inside.”

“Good.” Emily added, “Go straighten out those crazy sisters of yours.”

Jason laughed as he shook his head. “I’m no miracle worker, but I’ll see what I can do.”

“I’m going to go hang with the boys, Mom . . . If that’s okay?” Elizabeth looked at her mother as if she was awaiting approval. She had loved seeing her daughter be more attentive to the way she spoke to her and Ryan in the last few days, and also how much more affectionate she had become toward her brothers, Jack and Conner. It was nice, even if it came through heartache.

“Sure, honey.”

Once alone with Ryan in the yard, Emily reached for his hand, hoping he wouldn’t pull away like he had done at the gravesite that morning. While he didn’t move away, his hand was limp and seemed uninterested to be resting in hers. “Talk to me, Ryan. What’s going on?”

“My father passed away.”

“I know that, but?—”

Jerking his hand out from hers, he shook his head. “There’s no but, Em. Okay? I’m just trying to process.”

“We can’t move here so you can run the grill.”

He glared, his voice just above a whisper. “I never said we were.”

Touching her forehead, she shook her head. “I’m sorry. You know I loved Frank, but our entire life is in California, and I’m just scared.”

Furrowing his eyebrows, he shook his head. “Scared of what?”

“You.” Swallowing the lump in her throat, her lips trembled as she mustered the strength to continue her train of thought. “I’m sure it’s just the grief, but it feels to me like you’re changing. This man you’re becoming isn’t the man I’ve raised three children with. He’s different. I don’t know . . . I’m being paranoid and stupid. I just can’t help but feel scared.”

Taking a step closer, he grabbed each of her hands gently and pulled her in close. Then he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m not changing, Emily. I’m grieving. These last four days have been a blur, and I know I haven’t been the most present father to the kids or husband to you. And I . . .” He let a breath out from his lips as he paused. His voice strained to continue. “I’m just trying to survive.”

Pulling back from his embrace, Emily placed a hand on his chest as she peered into his glassy, red eyes. “Your father would want you to live, not merely survive, Ryan. Even right now, right after his passing . . . but I know that’ll take time, and I’m going to do my best to give you grace and space, but don’t forget to live.”

As he sat on the couch, Ryan shuffled through pictures of his father that had been hand-selected for the funeral. A favorite verse of his father’s echoed through his thoughts.

yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.

James 4:14

Hearing Jack and Conner, his five- and six-year-old boys, run from the bathroom to the guest room where they were sleeping caused his jaw to tighten. He had told them not to run multiple times that day. Tossing the pictures on the coffee table, he stood and walked down the hallway toward the guest room.

Emily popped out of the room they were staying in, meeting him in the hallway. “What’s wrong, Ryan?”

“Nothing. I’m going to pray and tuck the boys in.”